Confessions of a Portrait Artist

Two New Drawings of Very Different Things

2009-08-26T16:47:00.004-05:00

It took a while, but I finally got what I think is a decent drawing of Zachary Quinto. The man turned out to be rather difficult to capture - oddly, I don't think he's in character in this one (certainly not Spock, and he doesn't quite look like Sylar either). It's one of the most detailed drawings I've ever done, and it was good practice for patience and for keeping an eye on the big picture without getting too concerned about every hair of those lovely eyebrows.

And here's another very different one. I wasn't interested in horses when I was eight, or whatever the usual age is. But this summer, I started taking riding lessons, and had the pleasure of learning from an amazing teacher and her very special horse, the 17 year old mare Valentina. This is the first real horse drawing I've ever done, and now I think I might have to branch off into portraits of animals as well as people.

Mohinder Suresh

2009-08-07T16:12:00.009-05:00

I don't watch television, instead watching movies and occasionally a TV series online, which means that when I finally discover a good show, I'm late enough to get all of the episodes on Netflix (or YouTube), and watch three or four in a row. It's a different experience, watching a show that was written to be viewed once a week (I hate episode recaps at the beginnings!). Currently I'm watching Heroes, and I just finished blasting through season 1 on Netflix. Here's a drawing of Sendhil Ramamurthy as Dr. Mohinder Suresh, one of my favorite characters (not least because of his accent, which try as I might, I could not draw).

Severus Snape

2009-07-20T15:42:00.002-05:00

I'm re-reading the last two Harry Potter books, and tried a slightly different style of drawing in this portrait of the Half Blood Prince - Severus Snape. I've always liked bad guys (as my parents will attest after I announced at a very young age that my favorite character in The Lion King was Scar). Snape is a particularly tragic (and heroic) character, and despite his general nastiness, I couldn't help being intrigued, even in the early books. This drawing is mostly ebony pencil (with a little H pencil to smooth things out) on bristol board, and it's large - slighly larger than life, which was different for me, and fun. I took the graphite right up to the edges of the paper, so there was no cropping done in this photo. It made for an interesting and, I hope, powerful composition.

One more of Wolverine...

2009-07-17T19:13:00.001-05:00

Couldn't resist doing one more drawing of Wolverine. It's another pencil on bristol board - I spent way too many hours on this one.

Wolverine

2009-07-08T19:25:00.006-05:00

I really enjoyed the new X-Men movie - I've been looking forward to an X-Men Origins film, and Wolverine has always been my favorite. I'd never drawn Hugh Jackman before, except for a couple of quick sketches after The Prestige came out a few years ago.

Both of these drawings are pencil on Bristol board. I did the entire portrait (on the left) in one day yesterday, and I'm pleased that I'm getting faster. I used mechanical pencil more extensively, which requires me to work more slowly but results in a smoother, more finished texture. The full-body drawing on the right was an experiment with my new Ebony pencil.

Another drawing sent off into the World

2009-07-07T13:51:00.004-05:00

I've been following the BBC America television series Robin Hood, which sadly has been canceled after season 3 was completed a few weeks ago. I posted a drawing of my favorite character, Sir Guy of Gisbourne (played by the gorgeous Richard Armitage), on this blog a while back. The drawing sat in my sketchbook for several months, but earlier this summer I decided to send it to Mr. Armitage, just for fun. I had a great time addressing the envelope (bright red with an ornate design on it, for better visibility amongst other items of fan-mail).

Only three weeks after I'd sent it, I received an autographed photo in the mail. I was thrilled enough with that, and it took me several hours before I turned the photo over and saw the thank-you note on the back! It's always fun to send drawings off into the world.

Spock

2009-07-06T19:26:00.004-05:00

Hello World - yes, I'm still alive, just pretty silent in cyberspace for the past few months. Both drawing and blogging dwindled considerably over the school year, but I'm home in Alaska for the summer and drawing quite a bit. As a way to ease back in to the habit of blogging, here's a recently completed sketch of Spock (Leonard Nimoy) after I was inspired by the awesome new Star Trek movie.

Gray World

2008-11-14T12:16:00.002-06:00

It's hard to believe it's the middle of November already. Most of my classmates have already registered for classes next semester (I do so this Wednesday), and next semester will bring more changes for all of us. During theory discussion class this morning, several people were talking about how they won't have to take theory next semester - only BM students need the four semesters. Our TA apparently knew nothing of this, and kept saying, "What, you too?" every time a BA or BS student nodded. Only about a third of the class will return for the fourth semester of theory (we're wondering if they'll keep all four TAs, with five people per class...)

We'll still be together three times a week for Music History (my exam went quite well, by the way, and I hear we'll be getting them back on Monday), though with a new professor for the second semester.

It's another gray day in a gray world of mostly rain. It's rained every day this week, mostly in the late afternoon and evening, turning campus into a big squissy soggy mass of rotting leaves and puddles from the clogged drains. We've had a few snow flurries but it's been in the mid 30s to low 40s lately. I'm ready for some real snow.

Priorities

2008-11-10T09:49:00.004-06:00

I spent most of my weekend in Memorial Library, studying for my music history exam (which is tomorrow; wish me luck!); six hours on Saturday, four hours on Sunday, plus three more at home. I remembered to do my German homework, practiced the piano last night, and learned all my solfege melodies so I would be prepared for aural skills this morning. I even woke up early to sing before class. I was perfectly prepared for singing solo in front of the class (even though my TA rarely calls on me for some reason).

Of course, it would be just my luck that not only did he not call on me to sing (which I actually could have done), my theory TA decided to have a pop quiz in class this morning on a sonata analysis our professor said was due tomorrow. And, it being due tomorrow, was never even glanced at over the weekend; my plan was to do it this evening. Sigh. I half-heartedly made up a few answers, giving my TA my best "you said it was due tomorrow" look. That's college for you.

Another rainy Saturday

2008-11-08T13:11:00.002-06:00

It feels like the beginning of a new age after last Tuesday. One of those days when your professor says, okay, we're starting the next unit after your midterm, so you can now draw Two Big Lines in your notes. Like waking up for the first time in a new city, ready to start a new chapter in your life. The day we said Yes We Did instead of Yes We Can.

I can't tell you how thrilled I am that the first presidential election I voted in actually went the way I hoped it would. I was quite cynical in the weeks preceeding the election, and my family and friends did a good job of ignoring me. And I'll never forgot that night, seeing the streets filled with shouting, cheering college students at midnight, fireworks, car horns, an impromptu parade up and down State Street.

...

In the past three hours I've been over two hundred years of history review. I am now an expert on Renaissance Mass settings, madrigals, and Italian and French secular song of the Renaissance. I still have to go over Reform in the Catholic Church, 16th century instrumental music, and Radical Humanism. But hopefully by the end of this weekend I'll be ready for my second big music history exam. I'm taking a break here at Memorial Library, refreshing my ears by listening to a CD of pop/jazz standards sung with ukulele accompaniment (all that vocal polyphony starts to sound the same after a while, and there's nothing like a little ukulele to clear out the melismas). Lately I've been keeping busy with music history, German essays, and Trying Not to Fall in Love--the last one tends to require even more effort than music history.

One More: College Wisdom

2008-11-02T11:07:00.002-06:00

1. Murphey's Law: The one day you decide not to prepare your solfege melodies will be the day the professor decides to observe discussion section. It will also be the first day the TA chooses several people to sing two days in a row.

2. It is apparently possible to get a B on a midterm on which all of your answers are correct. (this is a good time to go to office hours)

3. There are too many settings of "Nur wer die Sehnsucht kennt" in existence, and they should not be studied exclusively for nine weeks. Insanity results.

4. 16th century madrigals are quite a lot of fun, especially when the professor decides that the textbook translations don't give quite the right idea of the content of the song. Our TA blushed just as furiously as the rest of us.

5. Freshmen really have no idea. No idea at all.

A Typical Monday

2008-11-02T10:36:00.002-06:00

I love Mondays, even more than I love Fridays. By Sunday evening I've done my laundry, vacuumed my one rug, printed my German essays and decided to postpone my sight-singing homework until the following morning (which I invariably do). I love waking up early Monday morning, packing my bag, and heading out for a day of non-stop classes.

Because I generally forget to practice my singing before class on Monday, I have a small breakfast in the cafeteria and jaywalk across the street to the Humanities Building at 8am to practice before class. I'm often the first to check out a practice room key - and I take a vocal room (which I have access to as a pianist), the kind with big fluffy rugs on the walls to absorb the sound, high ceiling, and a grand piano. Sight-singing has been getting easier this year, but it's nice they assign melodies and let us work out the solfege before we have to sing in front of the class.

My first class of the day is music theory discussion, a combination aural skills class and lecture discussion. This is exactly the same as last year (I'm now in Musica Practica 3, of 4). I love my TA (well, I love all my TAs this year), a mandolin player from Texas, with a primarily folk background, a first year doctoral student. Class generally consists of solo singing with solfege, aural transcriptions (aural transcriptions are the only things I don't ever get A's on), and discussing papers or lecture material.

I have an hour break after theory, and either practice or study until my music history lecture at 11am. None of us quite knew what to expect from Survey of the History of Western Music. It turns out to be a demanding, fascinating course, focusing primarily on listening (eg. being able to recognize pieces of different composers and styles by ear on exams). I did embarassingly well on the first big exam.

Just about everyone in the entire sophomore music class takes history at the same time, about 80 of us. Unlike music theory, which divides the 80 into two lectures, with two TAs per lecture (4 TAs total), history consists of lecture Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, all 80 of us in one class. We have only one TA, a second year doctoral student in Musicology. I have no idea how he manages to keep track of all of us, much less teach four discussion sections back to back on Tuesdays.

After history I walk two doors down the hall to Introduction to Music Technology. Taught by my piano professor, it's a fun intro to MIDI and digital audio. Our current project is making a techno song. Right after that, I walk up one flight of stairs to Morphy Hall, for my World Music lecture. A fascinating overview of world music and ethnomusicology, it's taught by a very young professor (about 30 years old). Our TA is a doctoral student, I'm not sure what year, who is an awesome jazz pianist (and a competitive swimmer).

I then have ten minutes to dash up Bascom Hill for German. I'm taking 203 this semester, and it's getting harder. Most of the work is essay writing, and while I'm a pretty fast writer in English, German is another matter entirely. Still, it's fun, and amazing how much I've learned in one year.

An hour after that, my last class of the day is piano masterclass, which I always enjoy--though I've been missing Dan Myers. I'll write more about piano later - but things have been going well, albeit slowly.

All right, I have a paper about my polyphonic Mass analysis to write, and I'd better get to it.

Sitting in a near-deserted library...

2008-11-02T10:27:00.002-06:00

...the day after the State Street Halloween party. I'm sure everyone is still hung-over.

Winter is on its way here in Madison (if it would stop occasionally being 60 degrees); it's gray and cloudy here, a gentle drizzle that's just enough to get the pavement wet but not quite enough to warrent unfolding my umbrella. I like late autumn. There's something romantic in a 19th century sort of way about the last few leaves on the trees, the drizzle that is sometimes snow, the flat, gray sky.

I haven't blogged since the beginning of the semester, but if you're really desperate to keep up with the not-too-interesting events of my daily life here, you can find me on Twitter (I'm jschallock) or Facebook. I'll do my best to write the occasional blog post as well. And as always, comments are welcome.

To catch up on just a few of the things that have been happening, I'm going to write several posts by topic, rather than cramming them all into one super-long post.

Go Badgers!

2008-09-06T20:52:00.009-05:00

I went to my first-ever football game today, at Camp Randall Stadium. (I really do mean my first game, ever, including high school). It was an amazing and fun experience to share with 80,000 other red-and-white-clad Badger fans; I clapped and sang and did the wave and had a blast being patriotic with my school. We had absolutely stunning seats (thanks to my cousins for the ticket, and for taking me to the game!!); we sat right at the 50-yard line.

We played Marshall (of the movie, We Are Marshall), and they gave us a good scare in the first quarter, ahead 14-0. After the first quarter, the Badgers got their act together. We won 51-14, and while most of the game went over my head, despite my cousin's efforts to explain everything, I was thrilled! I tried to keep the confused look off my face when a play ended with screaming Badger fans all around me and I had no idea what had happened. I eventually caught on to a few things (and that big board up there blinks "Touchdown!" at the appropriate moment, which I appreciated). I loved the marching band, the songs, and I finally know what "Jump Around" means!

Memorial for Dan

2008-09-05T18:01:00.003-05:00

We're all still working through the loss of our friend and classmate, Dan Myers. There is a small memorial set up in the student lounge of Humanities, with his biography and photograph, which saddens me every time I walk by. I keep thinking I'm going to see him walking to class, hear his playing through the walls of the practice rooms. It's a strange feeling.

There will be a memorial service for him and the other two students, on campus this Monday, September 8 at 8pm. http://www.news.wisc.edu/15556

(2nd) First Day Of Class

2008-09-02T22:07:00.003-05:00

Today was the first day of classes here at UW-Madison--or rather, my second first day, if you count last year. It was a lot less stressful than that first day a year ago; I didn't have to wander around Humanities looking for my professor's studio, I knew exactly how long it would take to walk up Bascom Hill, and I had friends in every one of my classes.

I have music theory--still known officially as Musica Practica--at 8:50 every day, and while I dearly miss our professor from last year, I think our new professor (Herr Professor Doktor, as he introduced himself) will be quite fun. The advantages of Musica Practica 2: no homework, no quizzes, no midterm, no textbook. Just two papers and an open-book final (which means bring your notes, because there's no book). Aural Skills is the same drill as last year, with discussion and singing/transcription tests. Something tells me this is going to be a tricky course, but I love theory and I expect lecture to be the highlight of my week again this year. (We'll be singing in class tomorrow, probably solo, so I practiced this evening. I have a dreadful cold, and I think I'm a tenor right now...)

We all felt a bit like Hogwarts students, and the subject matter is as close to magic as it gets (though what goes on in the fusion reactor down in Chamberlain is pretty magical too). I have two more new classes tomorrow, Music History and Music Technology. Music Tech is taught by my piano teacher, who I'm always happy to see, and it will be fun to do something a little different. Apparently at the end of the semester we'll be scoring music for an animated film, working in Logic Pro.

I had a nice visit with my piano professor this morning as well. It was great to connect with him again; he's very excited about Taubman technique, which he's absorbed a little but never studied formally. He agrees that it's probably the most promising for not only recovering from tendonitis but expanding and improving my technique over the next year. It will be interesting to see what barriers I can overcome. I had expressed my doubts about pursuing the performance major at all, but I feel very much reassured that there are people here who care and understand. I don't know how common it is to have a professor who is willing and (apparently) excited to work through this process with me, to learn with me.

This is not to say that I'm totally healed and guaranteed to succeed this year--I expect my academics and my music to be just as demanding as ever, but also just as exhilarating and rewarding. I'm getting smarter about how to be a student, how to practice, how to learn. My work will have a different flavor this year--I plan to use my brain more this time, rather than expecting hours of practice to do the work for me. In a way, six or seven hours of practicing a day was lazy. I'm starting to get a glimmer of a different approach, a successful approach to studying music. It's a mental breakthrough almost akin to my first discovery of Buddhism, a glimpse of a method of doing things that actually seems right. Of course I am bound to make many more mistakes and come up against all sorts of new obstacles. But I feel stronger, both spiritually and psychologically, ready to work and explore and meet whatever challenges come my way.

And if you've actually read all of that, you'll be as tired as I am. I'm off to bed, pretty sure I'm going to be a hoarse tenor at best tomorrow morning, but that's okay. I like tenors.

Daniel Myers--1986-2008

2008-08-30T18:52:00.005-05:00

I received some profoundly sad news when I arrived back on campus at UW-Madison yesterday--I learned that one of my classmates was killed on Wednesday in a car accident. All three students in the car were killed. Dan Myers had just graduated this summer with a BM in piano performance, and studied with my professor. He was easily the most brilliant student in our studio, both technically and musically gifted. I remember being so frightened of him, I a freshman, he an accomplished senior. The first piece I heard him play was Liszt's Totentanz.

Over the course of the year I discovered that he was immensely kind--I remember many conversations and words of encouragement, standing in the lobby of Humanities after masterclass. We were all in awe of him, but he was so encouraging to even us frightened freshmen.

So young, having just finished his degree, his future before him...it's almost overwhelming, how suddenly we can lose everything. My heart goes out to his friends, family, and teachers. We will miss you, Dan.

Back in Madison

2008-08-29T22:37:00.002-05:00

I arrived back in Madison this morning, slept away the afternoon, and have just gotten the computer plugged in and hooked up to the internet. Much to do this weekend in preparation for the beginning of classes this Tuesday, but it feels good to be back, despite the uncertainties that lie ahead.

So, this is just a quick note to say I made it here safe and sound, and I'll write a proper post tomorrow. And now, off to bed.

Guy of Gisborne

2008-08-24T01:11:00.002-05:00

This summer I really enjoyed time-consuming totally-for-fun activities like playing Guild Wars, reading Alastair Reynolds novels, watching BBC Robin Hood reruns on DVD, and doing mechanical pencil portraits.

After googling "Richard Armitage" and "Guy of Gisborne" I was glad to see that I'm not the only person out there with a thing for Sir Guy. (I mean, he does kill a lot of people, but that leather is just way too cool.) Here's a pencil drawing from a photograph, which took way too long but turned out okay.

Fiddle Tune bugs

2008-08-22T12:41:00.004-05:00

For some strange and unknown reason, the links for "Winter King", "Looking Glass", and "Silver Flute set" aren't working... We're in the process of fixing the links, so thanks for your patience. There is also a formatting problem with the "Melt the Ice in the Harbor" set. So far everything else works.

edit to add...yay, fixed!

New! Fiddle Tunes for Download

2008-08-21T19:18:00.002-05:00

Over the past few years I've dabbled in writing fiddle tunes, which my dad and I and a few friends have performed for contra dances and other venues. Thanks again to my brother's file hosting (and programming help) I've selected a few to make available for download from this blog. They're in the sidebar, under "Downloadable Fiddle Tunes", and I'll add more as I write more.

Feel free to print them, link to them, and share with your friends, but please, use them for non-commerical purposes only and respect the copyright of the composer. :)

Facelift

2008-08-21T17:35:00.004-05:00

I finally got bored with my old blogger template, but am too lazy to design a whole new one. So I'm slightly modifying one of blogger's templates--not totally sure about this design yet (I don't like the orange much...) but I'll let it stand for a few days. Incidentally, does anyone know how to change the blog title color?? It honestly shouldn't be this difficult...

edit to add: special thanks to my brother for the new blog header!

Kindle!

2008-08-02T15:22:00.003-05:00

I just got an awesome birthday present from my friends Brad and Amy : an Amazon Kindle! I'm blown away by the technology--the screen is still rather mystical to me--and the idea of being free of all those heavy piles of paper. I feel like I'm in a science fiction world whenever I hold it (a perfectly comfortable 10.3 ounces). Now, the difficult question of which book to put on it first...

Anahata

2008-07-21T13:27:00.004-05:00

As I work through recovering from tendonitis (and from the general stresses and strains of my first year of college), I have devoted a lot of attention to healing and better understanding my body. For the first four weeks after my return from school, I had weekly massages from a wonderful teacher, the director of Anahata, our local yoga studio and center for massage and Ayurvedic treatment. I began to experience levels of relaxation I never knew about, and with her help I have slowly recovered both spiritually and physically. After a few weeks of massage, I started going to regular yoga classes (also taught by my masseuse).

I have finally learned to remember those states--both physical and mental--of relaxation, calm control of my thoughts, and presence. I have been practicing bringing myself back to those states at will, conjuring up images of Anahata, the yoga studio, the sensations of lying on my back as the oil flows over my head in Shirodhara (which I don't pretend to understand, by the way). I find myself sleeping more soundly, and I no longer have trouble falling asleep--I don't have to follow the rapid film of my thoughts as they think me instead of me thinking them.

I read once that one should strive never to end a meditation session. You simply transition from sitting meditation to meditation throughout daily life, as seamlessly as possible. For now it is enough to form those associations and sensory memories and to enter into those states as often as possible, as often as I am aware. Suddenly life moves more slowly, and I have time to feel joy.

Simple Language for Complex Thoughts?

2008-07-06T18:58:00.004-05:00

I'm reading Scott Burnham's book "Beethoven Hero" this summer, the only book my Musica Practica professor recommended for our summer reading. It's an examination of Beethoven's "heroic style", a history of programmatic elements in music, and presents interesting ideas about the introduction of the human element in music. I found a more succinct blog post than I could manage about the book's argument, but as I slogged through the technical style of "Beethoven Hero" I found myself thinking more about the presentation of the information than the information itself.

I don't think of myself as a lazy reader, nor do I deny the necessity of complex technical discussion. I would not have understood the analysis sections of the book without my two semesters of music theory, but there is nothing wrong with writing to a specific audience (e.g. music theorists). But however interesting and compelling Burnham's argument, his writing style almost obscured the clarity of his thought.
One of my professors commented on an analytical paper I wrote about a Haydn symphony that when I delved deeper into the music and had more complicated thoughts, I would write "longer, more complicated paragraphs without even trying to." It was his way of saying, "great, good job, now see how much deeper you can go." But I was a little confused by his mention of a more complicated writing style, and I am confident that when I do have those "more complicated thoughts", I'll figure out a way to present them clearly.

Must the complexity of the material determine the complexity of our description? Once the analyst has done the mental work of dissecting and internalizing a complex process or object such as a symphony, is it possible to present one's understanding in a clear and simple way?

Sorry, I've only just turned off the rocket thrusters.

2008-07-02T19:58:00.002-05:00

I've been rather off-the-radar lately. I'm even falling behing on emails, which is extremely unlike me. But I'm finally getting my feet back on the ground, wobbling around a bit as I get my bearings and figure out where I've landed after a rocket-propelled first year of college.

When I first returned from school, I was happy to be home, but still laid low from my tendonitis. Now, a month later, I'm beginning to retrain my technique thanks to expert instruction in Taubman Technique. It will take a lot of time and care, but I know now that I will be able to play again, that I am physically capable of a "virtuosic technique", however long it will take to finally learn the correct movements! There is still a question of whether I'll be ready to jump back in as a performance major next fall, but I'm thinking about my options, and I refuse to be deterred. Strangely, this injury has forced me to consider carefully what I am doing and why, leading me to question some choices but reaffirm others. It's quite the journey, and I think I'm finally learning to be flexible along the way, while still staying true to who I am and how I want to live my life.

Thank you to two of the most influential people in my life. I can't tell you how much it means to me that you have believed in me and supported me as I flail around in this crazy adventure of figuring out who I am. It's good to see you again, Brad and Amy.

When I get home...

2008-05-12T18:14:00.002-05:00

...I'm looking forward to:
breakfast at Duncan's
walks by the sea
fishing
homemade lattes
Half Life 2
Yohimbe and Sophie the cats
visiting friends!

six more days!

Winterreise

2008-05-08T20:56:00.001-05:00

I promise not to make a habit of posting my papers on my blog, but I had fun with this one, it's not technical (compared to most of the papers I wrote this semester), and it might be interesting for any musicians out there.

“Winterreise”: A Strange and Powerful Journey

On Friday, April 4, an audience was taken on a strange journey through a frozen landscape. The spring evening outside seemed the illusion rather than the frightening world which unfolded within. The piece was Schubert’s Winterreise, and it was brought to life by tenor James Kryshak and pianist Martha Saywell in the Meriter Retirement Community Ballroom. Both are graduate students at UW-Madison; James Kryshak is pursuing his Masters Degree in Opera Performance, and this performance was in partial fulfillment of Ms. Saywell’s Doctor of Musical Arts in Collaborative Piano degree.
Winterreise is a cycle of twenty-four songs lasting approximately an hour and fifteen minutes, performed with no intermission and only brief pauses between songs. It was written in 1827, when Schubert was already suffering from the illness that would claim his life the following year at the age of 31. The poems were written by Wilhelm Müller and published in two volumes, which Schubert set separately. Winterreise tells the story of a rejected lover who slips away in secret one wintry night. He begins to wander through a landscape that mirrors his own turmoil as if he himself creates the snows and storms around him. He is sometimes frantic and crazed, sometimes depressed with barely enough energy to keep walking. The landscape is both the object and the canvas upon which it is painted. The line between reality and his crazed imaginings soon disappears, just as my own grasp of reality was suspended during the course of the evening, and for some time afterwards.
Winterreise takes the piano beyond the role of mere accompanist. Ms. Saywell provided the landscape through which Mr. Kryshak traveled, but the piano part was independent, often with an upper melodic line in a duet with the tenor. Gute Nacht, the first song of the cycle, began with a brief introduction, the piano bringing out the melody repeated at the tenor’s entrance six measures later. Ms. Saywell dropped to a soft but present pianissimo at Mr. Kryshak’s entrance, letting him take the melody while providing a solid support. The repeated chords in the piano, characteristic of Schubert’s songs, have a more profound meaning in this piece; they are like unrelenting, unceasing footsteps. Gute Nacht modulates to the parallel major for a time, but returns to minor, the end of comfort and sanity.
The second song, Die Wetterfahne, had a much more active piano part. Ms. Saywell began the song at a rapid tempo, which Mr. Kryshak only pushed more. Piano and tenor were often in unison; Ms. Saywell watched carefully, her eyes darting from her score to the tenor and back again. Mr. Kryshak was very much in character; the intensity and madness showed in his facial expressions. I began to forget that this was only a story, as the emotions depicted were so raw and immediate.
It was difficult to get a sense of the timescale of Winterreise. Sometimes it felt as if the journey had taken years, but the rapid changes of emotion from one song to the next accelerated the sense of time, creating an uncertainty as to whether I was observing an actual journey or an externalization of the turbulent emotions. From the frantic spinning of the weather vane in Die Wetterfahne, the music lapses into depression in Gefor’ne Thränen. The piano part was heavy but not too slow; in fact, it could have been slower without dragging. The texture felt thinner, the mood more of vulnerability, almost tenderness. Tenor and pianist skillfully matched intensity and interpretation—few cues were needed to communicate phrasing or tempo. I never felt tension between the piano and voice; they created the image together, without strife.
Erstarrung returned to the high-energy emotion; Ms. Saywell and Mr. Kryshak took it quite fast, the tenor’s eyes glistening as his melody filled the hall. I was struck by his intensity, by the power and projection of his voice. After the concert I heard someone remark that this was “a young person’s Winterreise”. Schubert was a young man when he wrote it, and a young man when he died; Winterreise seems a young’s person’s piece. Ms. Saywell and Mr. Kryshak communicated that tragedy, so much more painful in youth.
In Der Lindenbaum, the piano depicts the wind rustling in the leaves of the tree, only a memory in the dead of winter. The wanderer says farewell to his friend the Linden Tree, and is then overwhelmed with sadness in Wasserflut—“Floodwater”, in which his tears flow as a hot stream in the snow. Mr. Kryshak held nothing back, filling the hall with a powerful explosion of sound that Ms. Saywell did not try to match.
The piano was mocking and uncaring in Auf dem Flusse. Ms. Saywell used little pedal; the river is frozen, still and unyielding. The dotted rhythm in the accompaniment added to the mocking attitude. Rückblick moved rapidly from major to minor, from nostaligic remembrance to painful truth. The tempo was fast, almost frantic. Irrlicht tells of the Will-o’-the-Wisp, marked by short sections with clear breaks between verses. Rast returns to clear tone painting in the piano, which moved in steady march-like chords. Though the wanderer finds shelter from the cold and the storm in the second verse, his limbs “take no repose” and he must move on, driven by the gnawing within him.
Frühlingstraum, the “Dream of Spring”, was one of the most intense songs in the cycle. The first four lines of each stanza were light and happy, but the happiness was only a dream, interrupted by piano and tenor together awakening to the horrible reality. The wanderer lapsed back into his dream, only to awake again. Mr. Kryshak’s emotion showed clearly in the pained expression on his face.
The middle songs of the cycle oscillated between delirious dreams of spring and hope and a realization of the reality of winter and darkness. Einsamkeit was intense throughout, with fewer changes of texture through the course of the song; the wanderer laments the calm, bright day, wishing for storms. Die Post returns to some hope, as the wanderer wonders if the post brings a letter for him. Mr. Kryshak cried out “Mein Herz?” in his slightly nasal but powerful voice, and I felt the painful contrast between the light, galloping piano and the lamenting tenor.
After the subtle reference to suicide in Der Lindenbaum, the wanderer displayed increasing signs of madness. In Die Krähe, he begins to succumb to insanity. The Crow flies around the wanderer’s head, waiting for him to die, and he is only glad to see “faithfulness to the grave”. The music wound around in circles, moving from minor to major. The faster rhythm of the triplets in the piano continued the unceasing forward motion. The next song, Letzte Hoffnung, removed any doubt that madness is upon him. The piece began with staccato notes dropping one by one from the piano, the dead leaves falling from the trees. Our disturbed wanderer fixes his gaze on a single leaf and decides that if it falls, all his hopes fall with it. Ms. Saywell was sensitive to Mr. Kryshak’s phrasing and rubato, allowing him to lead during the last section of the song, “Wein’, wein’ auf meiner Hoffnung Grab,” , “I weep, I weep upon my hope’s grave,” finally ending with the staccato dry leaf chords.
In Im Dorfe, Mr. Kryshak was aware of the measured trills in the piano, careful not to push the tempo despite his slow melody. Der stürmische Morgen showed the world again reflecting his own emotion, but this is the first time he refers to itself himself, singing “My heart sees its own picture painted in the sky!” He seems happy about this; the tenor and piano had a bold melody in unison, with a forceful dotted rhythm, a strange accord between wanderer and landscape.
Tone painting is again evident in Der Wegweiser, where repeated eighth note chords show the obsession, the restlessness, the signposts at intervals as regular as the eighth notes. Mr. Kryshak created the motion with Ms. Saywell instead of being constrained by it. The song never really modulated to minor and remained dark and depressed throughout. In Das Wirthshaus, slow, peaceful chords in the piano moved with the tenor. They communicated the subtle rubato and let the phrase breathe and flow more naturally than the relentless repetition of the previous song. Das Wirtshaus, “The Inn”, is a cemetery, and the wanderer laments the fact that the “pitiless hostel” has no available room for him. The piano has a hymn-like ending, gentle and reverent.
Mut, “Courage”, seemed to appear out of nowhere. They took a fast tempo, emphasizing the dotted rhythm of courage and determination. This brief moment of determination faded into disturbed fantasy yet again in one of the most bizarre songs of the cycle, Die Nebensonnen. The penultimate song, it moved slowly and reverently, like a chorale. Ms. Saywell watched Mr. Kryshak carefully, for he took much rubato and lingered at the climaxes of phrases. The poem itself is strange, describing three suns in the sky, the “two best ones”, most likely the eyes of his beloved, disappearing and leaving the third (the real sun) to stare at him.
The final song of the cycle, Der Leiermann, is a striking example of tone painting, the piano’s drone and the strophic form of the song depicting the ancient hurdy-gurdy man. The tenor repeats the same melody over and over, like the endless misery that has consumed him. The cycle ends with the same B minor drone in the piano. “Strange old man! Shall I go with you? Will you grind away on your hurdy-gurdy to my songs?” he sang, with a numbness much deeper than the numbness of the winter cold, all emotion spent.

A Few Things I've Learned This Semester

2008-05-08T20:32:00.003-05:00

(in no particular order):
1. When your accompanying professor says you have until Thursday to learn Die Forelle, you practice. A lot.
2. Die Forelle is not really about a fish.
3. Schubert was a genius.
4. In the GDR, East Berliners couldn't get fresh fruit such as bananas.
5. It actually does work better to peel bananas upside down.
8. All it takes is a single experience to undermine a lifetime of carefully reinforced prejudice.
9. Beethoven's Opus 2 No. 1 mvt 4 is dangerous.
10. It's nice when professors known your name. It takes a little effort, but it's worth it. (Note: especially valuable when you don't actually have any classes with them)
11. May 1 is the official "rioting day" in Germany.
12. Office hours are there for a reason, we already pay for them, and the professors just sit in there bored, waiting for you to call on them so they can impart great wisdom. Go to office hours.
13. Music is a simulacrum of human cognition.

Thursday

2008-05-08T19:14:00.003-05:00

Today was my last day of "real" classes--tomorrow we're finishing up a few things in our Musica Practica discussion (my last class with my wonderful TA Steve...I'm sad) and having a party in German class. I had my last lecture with Professor Hyer this morning, which for me was very sad, and very strange; he made no end of year speech, acted no differently than any other Thursday. He ended the year on a strange note, with a discussion of Schubert's "Gretchen am Spinnrade"--and he certainly did not gloss over the sexuality of the piece. We all sat, stunned, as he talked about the sexual climax brought on by Gretchen's daydream of Faust; we're college students, we talk about sex all the time, but what was stunning was hearing it discussed in a Musica Practica lecture. It was traumatic, but refreshing in a way, despite being an odd way to end the year.

After the theory lecture I hiked up Bascom Hill and sat on the floor of Van Hise waiting for my turn to do my German oral project--which consisted of recording an introduction I wrote for a song, which will be aired over the radio in Halle, Germany next Tuesday.

I had a short break, and then walked over to Humanities for a "piano" lesson. As I'm not playing the piano right now, Professor Welbourne has started teaching me about Max/MSP. After an hour, I said I was very sorry but had to dash off to Accompanying, just to fill out course evaluations for my professor. "Why don't you come back afterwards?" he said, and fifteen minutes later I was back in his studio. I spent the rest of the afternoon with him, playing with Max, singing into the microphone and enjoying the harmonic series, discussion music, jobs, piano department politics, and moose, among other things.

Lesbians vs. Lesbians

2008-04-30T20:52:00.002-05:00

This made me laugh: http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080430/ap_on_re_eu/greece_lesbian_pride_2

...

Tonight was our freshman accompanying recital, essentially the final exam for Music 242: Introduction to Accompanying. Because of my tendonitis, I couldn't play and was the only one of the six freshman pianists who wasn't in the recital...I ran the video camera, applauded, and was generally Audience. I can tell the semester is nearing its end; I've given away two thank-you cards to teachers so far, each one a goodbye or at least a goodbye-for-now.

Tendonitis is a strange thing. I'm not in terrible pain, I'm not sick in bed, and yet I go to my classes and can't touch a piano, I watch as my friends play their juries and concerts while I sit in the audience. I know it isn't my fault, not really, but I still can't help feeling that I made a stupid mistake somewhere and hurt myself when I should have been able to keep up with everyone else... At least my German grades have been good lately, as I have nothing to do but study.

Tendonitis (and other things)

2008-04-28T20:27:00.003-05:00

First, I'd like to say that I have finally experienced a full circle on Facebook, as I just friended someone who is mutual friends with my choral director and my German TA from last semester, which in a school of 41,000 students is quite something.

I guess it's time to blog, especially to let everyone know the latest development in my undergraduate piano career. About three weeks ago I developed tendonitis, and I was instructed by my professors to stop playing completely until it heals, which means I have not touched a piano in well over two weeks. It was depressing and very difficult at first, but as the end of the semester approaches, I'm actually feeling less stressed. I still get a little heartache when I see my friends play in class, but everyone has been very understanding and supporting. Two friends (seniors who just played their senior recitals) have been helping me out with a band concert I was supposed to play for and a soprano I was accompanying, and we're postponing my jury until next fall.

I'm keeping busy. I actually drew a portrait last week, my first "real" drawing besides a few sketches since I came to school. I did a conte crayon portrait of my piano professor's two daughters. It's now hanging in his studio, and he and his wife seemed pleased to get it. I got a photograph from his wife, but we kept it a secret from my professor, which was fun.

Today was melancholy, as it was the last day of University Chorus, a class I will dearly miss. Our concert last night went surprisingly well, and today was just logistics of returning music and filling out course evaluations for our director, James. (we laughingly filled in the bubble for "excellent" next to every evaluation question) I saw James later this evening at Starbucks, which was nice, as I was reminded that he hasn't vanished off the face of the earth just because I'm no longer in his class. I haven't played/sung in many ensembles, but it was an honor to sing in James' chorus; I'll miss his energy, his passion for music, his magical way of encouraging us to do the very best we could do and nurturing us for who we are while still demanding professionalism and seriousness in our music-making.

Also, in the course of this afternoon, it first hailed, then snowed, then rained. Just thought I'd say that.

Soil Order Headache

2008-04-12T13:37:00.002-05:00

Yes, I'm still here...I'm more present on facebook these days, but I'll try to keep up with the occasional blog post.

I've been studying for a geography exam all day...right now I'm working on soils, and then I'm moving on to review rocks. There are only five soil-forming regimes, which is pretty manageable, but there are twelve orders of soils, which I keep getting confused because of the strange names. My professor said the names are a "dead giveaway", but here are a few names and their derivations:

Laterization: Later (Latin: brick)
Podzolization: podzol (Russian: like ashes)
Gleization glej (Polish: muddy ground)

Alfisols: al for aluminum, f for iron
Entisols: last three letters in "recent", meaning these are young soils
Mollisols: mollis (Latin: soft)
Ultisols: ultimus (Latin: last), meaning these soils have had the last of their nutrients leached out.
Vertisols: verto (Latin: turn), soils in which material from the upper layers falls through surface cracks, so the normal horizon order (layers) is inverted

I don't know who named these, but the naming system doesn't sem very coherent. I mean, "entisols"? Come on...

Chicago Part II

2008-03-30T23:03:00.002-05:00

The concert was sold out. We sat together in a little cluster of pianists, looking down at the 9-foot Steinway that looked pretty small. Symphony Hall is built vertically, which makes for good sound but you'd better not be afraid of heights. Most of the seats are in the first and second balcony, and the sound it better up there than on the floor.

Brendel played Haydn's "Variations in F Minor, Hob. XVII/6", which were charming and quite masterfull, followed by Mozart's sonata in F Major, K. 533/K. 494, which I worked on in high school. After the Mozart he played Beethoven's sonata in E-flat Major, Op. 27 No. 1 (Op. 27 No. 2 is the Moonlight sonata), and after intermission, Schubert's great sonata in B-flat Major, D. 960. It was fun to hear a program I was very familiar with--the only piece I had never heard before was the Haydn, as I played the Mozart, a friend of mine played the Beethoven last semester, and our professor played the Schubert just a few weeks ago. Of course, Brendel played stunningly, with such grace and ease. Some people just make it look so easy...

About halfway through the last movement of the Schubert, Professor Welbourne leaned over and whispered in my ear, "He's in the the wrong key!" I turned to him with a confused look on my face. What? I mouthed to him. "That's the end!" was all he said, and I had no idea what had happened until after the concert. Apparently Brendel accidentally skipped the F major section in the last movement by accident and went right on to the B-flat section, which is the end (the return of the tonic music, in the original key). I had no idea, as I don't know the piece well enough, but Professor Welbourne said he ended up playing the B-flat section twice to make up for the difference. I'm sure not many people noticed, but in a way, it's nice to know that even the great musicians forget what comes next sometimes.

(to be continued)

Chicago: Part 1

2008-03-22T09:45:00.003-05:00

Two weeks ago I had the incredible experience of hearing pianist Alfred Brendel's last concert on tour in the United States before his retirement this year. My piano professor has a tradition of taking his piano studio to Chicago to hear a piano recital every other year (on off-years we have a composer-themed dinner party at his house). There were several pianists to choose from, and for scheduling reasons we ended up choosing Brendel--my professor found out only after he bought the tickets that it would be Brendel's last concert. It was my first trip to Chicago, very special and a memory I will treasure forever.

We met in Humanities at 10:15 am on Sunday; miraculously no one was late, and no one forgot to change their clocks for daylight saving time. Half the studio went with Dan, a senior who has a car, and the rest of us went with our professor; we carpooled to Harvard, Illinois. It felt great to get off campus, and to have so much time to talk with my professor and my friends. Harvard was practically abandoned on a Sunday afternoon, and we waited almost an hour for the train to the city, standing in a huddle of pianists, watching the snow accumlate on each other's shoulders and hats.

I pretended it wasn't the first time I'd ever taken a train anywhere when we climbed onto the austere commuter train. There wasn't even a station--just a concrete platform where the train stopped briefly. It took about two hours--much longer than it would take to drive, but it was fun, and we didn't have to worry about parking or driving in Chicago. My professor and I don't have any trouble talking for hours on end, and it was nice to spend time with him outside the studio. We finally pulled into Ogilvie Transportation, which was the first train station I'd ever seen, and hurried the nine or ten blocks to Orchestra Hall.

An Unexpected Piano Lesson

2008-02-23T21:23:00.002-06:00

I had a wonderful day today. I woke up at 7am, unusual for me on a Saturday, and spent an hour and a half at Steep and Brew coffee house, finishing up a paper. After a relaxing and productive morning, I met two friends to go grocery shopping. We have way too much fun grocery shopping, and it was nice to get off campus and have a chance to chat like the music major geeks we truly are. After dropping off our groceries, we went out for a fantastic lunch, and parted at last to go practice and do homework.

Today was one of the audition days for prospective undergraduate music majors, which meant that every practice room would be full. I decided not to bother trying to get a room until after 3:00pm, so I had a cup of tea and made it a few pages further into that music theory article. When I finally wandered over to the Humanities Building, auditions were pretty much over and I got a good piano. I had warmed up carefully with about forty five minutes of scales and arpeggios, and was working on spots in my Beethoven with the metronome (which I had stuffed into a glove because my ear buds died and the darn metronome was too loud).

I and my fellow piano majors often visit each other in the practice rooms, usually coming in without even knocking. We like dropping in on each other, especially as we are usually working on the same pieces. So I wasn't too surprised to hear a soft knock on my door. I thought to myself, "Huh, it's a bit early for visitors"--my friend who visits me most often tends to practice later in the evening. I abruptly stopped playing and looked over my shoulder through the narrow window into the hallway. With some surprise I saw, not one of my classmates, but my piano professor! I pulled the metronome out of the glove and turned it off, leaping up to open the door. "Hi," said my teacher with a smile. "Want a lesson?"
I grinned. "Sure!"
"Great! See you upstairs!"
I met him upstairs a few moments later, after returning my practice room key. He had cancelled my lesson a few days earlier, and promised to reschedule. The last thing I had expected was for him to come find me in a practice room late on Saturday evening, but it was certainly fun. He gave me one of the best lessons I've ever had; we worked on my Beethoven sonata, focusing on how to get a big, controlled sound. An hour and a half later, I was exhausted, but he ended the lesson only because he had to catch the bus home a few minutes after six.

Anyone who complains that the professors here don't care about their students needs to talk to me.

Still Here...

2008-02-22T17:40:00.002-06:00

...though I don't blame you for wondering, given how frequently I'm blogging these days.

I can't stare at that music theory article any more. Now I understand why my professor said "All good readers are generous readers: it is important for us not to take offense or be put off when the occasional sentence or even paragraph sails over our heads". Occasional? Right, I'll work on that. Before lecture the other day, I was talking to a friend, who said, "You know that feeling where you're reading something but you look up and realize you have no idea what you just read?" My theory professor overheard us and said, "I spent all of 1997 in that state!" We laughed. But I'm having that feeling right now. Sigh.

Very soon I'm heading back to the practice rooms, but I figured I should catch up on the news. I'm getting settled back in, remembering my routine from last semester, and still trying to have a life. I've felt better lately, as I've had a few opportunites to do something not related to school work. Last night was especially fun, as I got to play stage-hand for my piano professor's rectial. He played, among other things, a volume of Olivier Messiaen's Catalogue d'oiseaux, and I got to run the projector, clicking through pictures of the different birds as they are portrayed in the music. It was great fun, and a cool recital. And I enjoyed stage-handing during intermission and between pieces. It's always more fun to be part of a concert rather than just an audience member, even if all you do is help move the piano and plug in the speakers.

...

Several of my teachers have had the flu this past week, and I'm bound and determined not to get sick. My plan of action: sleep, vitamin C, and near-OCD hand-washing. Well, I guess I'd better head back to the practice rooms. So much for a break this afternoon. In two hours all I did was go cross-eyed over that music theory article. Eeek. Now, off to scales and arpeggios.

taking a break at the library...fuzzy brained

2008-02-02T17:12:00.001-06:00

I've been at the library for about the past four hours, with a couple more to go. Then I have to go practice. Sigh.

Last night was bizarre. Hoping to get a good night's sleep, I drank several cups of Yogi "Sleep" Tea, which has a frighteningly long ingredients list not separated into active and inactive components. In the past I've found it to result in a sound sleep, with no side effects that I have noticed except reluctance to get out of bed the next morning. I usually sleep soundly when I finally manage to fall alseep (even when it's not drug-induced), and I almost always dream and remember my dreams. For the past two weeks, however, I haven't remembered a single dream. It's as if my nights vanished into darkness, without the usual vivid nocturnal adventures. I must say I missed my dreams.

Last night, I think I was awakened ten or fifteen times by partying students, including one bizarre incident of insistent but rhythmic knocking (consisting of triplets with quarter notes at the end of the phrase) on my door at 3am, which I ignored. (That was hard--I thought they might break down the door, but after about ten minutes they left). And every time I woke up, I remembered a different dream. I still remember four or five of them, ranging from an affectionate encounter with a professor (don't ask) to images of sheet music flowing past my eyes, with accompanying roman numerals and soundtrack. I was analyzing the music in the dream--it consisted of a musical sentence (a form we've been studying in theory lately). I woke up right after the full cadence. How much weirder can it get??

I don't know if it was the tea or the interrupted REM cycles, but last night more than made up for the two weeks of missed dreams.

What I Did on Thursday Night In Madtown Part II

2008-02-01T23:02:00.000-06:00

The line progressed more quickly than I thought, and soon we were confronted by a very beautiful blonde hostess. "Reservation?" she asked sweetly as the three of us held out our student IDs and the one dollar admission. My two friends were silent, suddenly worried we wouldn't be able to get in without a reservation. "Yes," I said, "Schallock, for three." She nodded, and crossed my name off a type-written sheet in her leather-bound book. My friends looked at me with surprise. Then she drew large smiley faces on the backs of our hands with a sharpie, which proclaimed us as "Under Twenty-One Years Of Age"--which I had also checked online earlier (all shows were 18 and older). We we ushered into the show room by another waitress, past a sign on the wall that said "Two Drink Minimum". We frowned a bit at that. I'd never seen a drink minimum sign before.

We sat down at one of the small round tables, with a candle in the center, in the dark, intimate, club. I have to admit that it was the first time I'd ever been in a real club (that is, a club that doesn't sell steak dinners), and I felt very sophisticated. The effect was slightly dampened by the fact that I had a large smiley face on my hand, I met the two drink minimum with diet cokes, and the show opened with the person who listens to me mutilate solfege every morning. Still, after a while, we started relaxing, and we were able to just enjoy the comedy, the atmosphere, and the fun of doing something different and just a little bit scary.

We ended up having a lot of fun. It was about what I expected, but funnier and classier than I thought it would be (explicit sexual humor aside, of which there was rather a lot). But there was a good balance of clean jokes as well, which I personally found funnier--though I'm not really easily offended. College does that to you, I guess. Our waitress really did insist on the two drink minimum. We ordered another diet coke, pepsi, and sprite, respectively. At least we gave her a good tip (seeing as we weren't buying expensive cocktails). I think we were the only three people there who left completely sober. We stayed for the whole show, finally leaving at 10:30, but not before saying goodbye to our TA, who seemed not displeased that we were there. Sort of surprised in a pleasant embarassed way, which I think is an appropriate reaction. We parted, knowing we'd see him again the next morning at 9:55am for sight-singing.

I walked home, still laughing at the incongruity of it all, happy in having reached a milestone in my college career in Madtown. Even if I did only drink diet coke, and have a large smiley face on my hand, and, well, you know.

What I Did on Thursday Night in Madtown Part I

2008-02-01T17:59:00.000-06:00

I haven't been very good about keeping up with my blog...I say that every time, don't I? Classes are going well, if a bit overwhelming. They're all very different, and demanding in their own way (except for University Chorus, which is just plain fun). Accompanying is great, but we have a lot of music to learn in a short amount of time. I finally found a student soprano to accompany for the semester. I will be playing for all her lessons, her jury, and any other departmental recitals she does. In return, she plays for a couple of my accompanying masterclasses, and my accompanying departmental recital at the end of April (which is my final exam). I'm still looking for an instrumentalist to play for as well.

I'll catch up on more class news and details later. For now, here's what I did last night in Madtown:

You have to know that Thursday in Madison is "Thirsty Thursday"--for some odd reason, the night of choice for partying.

(insert to add: blogger just deleted most of a very good post, which I will try to reproduce yet again...darn it)

I've never liked the idea of lots of drunk college students wandering around. It's bad enough living on State Street, with people shouting and swearing outside my window, or even outside my hallway. I have never "gone out" in the evening to do anything more exciting than have dinner with friends or go to a symphony concert. But when two of my fellow piano majors, who are in the same theory class as I am, invited me to go with them to a show at Comedy Club on State Street last night, I just couldn't resist. The reason: my theory TA would be opening the show! I was among the first to discover last semester that our TA is a stand-up comedian, and it didn't take long before everyone in the class had seen the YouTube videos. I couldn't pass up the opportunity to see him live.

We agreed to meet outside my dorm half an hour before the show. I had a feeling that we would need reservations, so I wrote a quick email to the club before walking out the door, on the off-chance that it would help. The oddness of the evening began when I met my friends on the corner, and saw that they were joined by another taller someone. When I got closer, I was surprised to see my choral director! The four of us walked down State Street together, talking about chorus, music, teaching, me all the time wondering where he had come from! When he turned off to a side street and said goodbye, I asked my friends, "Did you just randomly meet him on the street?" "Yeah, we did!" they replied. So the night began with out-of-context encounters with music teachers.

The Comedy Club is close to the capitol building, and it was a few more minutes before we found the small awning and steep, narrow staircase. Slightly apprehensive, we opened the door at the very top of the stairs, and entered a classy lobby with a long line extending into another room. It was dark, old-fashioned, and I felt as if we had been transported to some other city, in some other place. We got in line, exchanging giggles and uncomfortable looks, when we saw our TA standing right across from us! "You guys!" he moaned, as he saw us, and he grinned and shook his head. We said hello, and told him we couldn't resist coming to see him. It was hard to tell if he was flattered or horrified. Possibly a bit of both.

Back at school (also 200th post)

2008-01-21T16:50:00.000-06:00

First off, this is my 200th post on this blog, which is pretty cool.

I got back to Madison yesterday morning after a red-eye flight (I left Anchorage at 9:45 pm and arrived in Madison at 8:30 am--3 hour time difference of course). Winter break was all right; I slept, read a lot of novels, and did pretty much nothing. I did play for three contra dances with my dad, which was fun, and I caught a beautiful 25 pound white winter king salmon, which was awesome.

I slept almost all day yesterday, and then found that my jet lag prevented me from falling alseep again until almost one in the morning. Nevertheless, I woke up refreshed and calm this morning, ran lots of errands, and enjoyed the balmy weather (7 degrees above 0 Fahrenheit today, much warmer than 10 below yesterday!). Now stocked up on school books, supplies, groceries, and green tea, I'm ready for my second semester.

Classes start tomorrow. Everything is pretty much the same as last semester, except that Keyboard Skills has become Accompanying (miss you, Kui!) and I'm taking Geography 120: Global Physical Environments, to take the place of Psych 202. Now I just have a lot of piano practicing to do!

Gotta love the Post Office

2007-12-18T12:22:00.001-06:00

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20071215/ap_on_fe_st/odd_long_lost_card

We guarantee delivery by Christmas. But not necessary this year.

Jury and Theory Exam!

2007-12-17T19:48:00.001-06:00

Today was my biggest day of the semester, and probably the most fun. I packed up my black skirt and heels, shuffled through the snow to Humanities at about 11am, and found the building packed with well-dressed and harried music students. Every single piano practice room was taken, so I went through my scales on an old Yamaha upright in between a cellist and an oboist way over in the 1400 block (the pianos are 1200s). After an hour I went back to the key desk and found that one piano room had opened up. I changed into my concert clothes and practiced until a few minutes before 2pm. Feeling strange with no sheet music under my arm, no backpack, no books, I walked down the hallway to the stage door of Mills Hall. The hallway was crammed full of percussion instruments, and the piano faculty were busy helping move marimbas and chimes and snare drums off stage. I waited just outside the door until they had finished, and walked onstage as my professor adjusted the piano. "It's a little crooked," he said, rolling the Steinway ever so slightly to the side. I smiled. It reminded me of my performance of the Mozart piano concerto, when my dad stood up from his place as concertmaster of the orchestra and locked the wheels on the piano before I walked out.

First I played my scales. One of the other piano professors called out major and minor scales, and I played them. That went perfectly, and I passed my scale proficiency test. Then I played my Bach prelude and fugue, my Bartok, and got a little over halfway through my Beethoven sonata movement when they stopped me. They had started late, and my ten minutes were up. My memory was fine, and to my slight surprise I wasn't even a little bit nervous. I couldn't be more pleased with how it went, and in a few days I'll get my grade.

I celebrated by going to Starbucks (no caffeine before performances), and soon headed back to Humanities again. It was, if possible, even more crowded, now with freshman theory students clutching their notebooks in anticipation for our Musica Practica final. The final began at 5:05pm, and we were told to expect it to take two hours. The TAs passed out blue books (I felt like a real college student!), and three sheets of paper including the full score for an excerpt of the trio we'd be analyzing.

I felt confident and prepared, though the exam was rather long and involved. The composition section was easy for me (8 measures of four voice harmony), and the analysis section included diagrams and short essay answers. It did take me the whole two hours. About halfway through, one of the TAs announced that we'd be taking a short break, "as Professor Hyer was kind enough to bring donoughts for everyone." Surprised and delighted, we returned to our exam with slightly stickier fingers but smiles on our faces. I was not the first to finish the exam (anyone done half and hour early for that test must have missed something important) but was done right at 7pm.

Walking back down the hallway, now relatively deserted, I saw Professor Hyer, who had not been in the classroom when we took the exam. "Thanks for the donoughts!" I called to him. He stopped, and asked me how it went and whether the time seemed reasonable. We visited for a moment; he asked when I was flying home (he knew I was from Alaska; I have no idea how). I thanked him again for a great semester, and left Humanities smiling.

One more day! I'll spend tomorrow practicing for my Keyboard Skills final (I didn't practice today after my jury), run a few errands, play my final, and then tomorrow, home!

Doing what you love and loving what you do

2007-12-15T22:39:00.001-06:00

I had a productive practicing day; almost six hours and then two friends rescued me and took me to Starbucks. Otherwise I'd probably still be in a practice room. I'm having way too much fun here, working hard but doing what I love every minute. I'm so fortunate to be able to pursue my dream, to study what I love and to follow my passion. I have difficulty understanding those music majors who can't wait until they are done with Musica Practica, or score reading, or sight-singing. I was stunned when someone told me they would be happy when they were "done with music theory". I'll never be "done with music theory" for the rest of my life. I cannot separate "theory" from "piano" from "aural skills" from "keyboard skills". It's all music. Why major in music if you don't love it? Why study music if you don't love to practice, to perform, to learn and understand?

For some professions, I can understand ulterior motives. But music? There is most likely no fame, almost certainly no fortune, and there are few endeavors more demanding. It's a strange but wonderful world, the most powerful way I know to connect with our fellow human beings, to take some part of yourself or your entire self and project it out there for the whole world to hear and feel. I can think of nothing more magical, more wonderful, or more bizarre to devote my life to, but I love every moment of it. Every arpeggio, every counterpoint assignment, every sight-reading journal.

Four more days

2007-12-14T18:45:00.000-06:00

Wow, what a crazy few weeks! It's hard to believe there are only four more days left until I go home. Amazing how quickly the time has passed.

It's been "life as usual" here, but rather accelerated. This week felt strange, as I had to say goodbye to several people and several teachers. Thursday was my last psychology exam (which went very well, I thought). Today I had my very last German 101 class (and a test). A few of us will be in the same German 102 class, but others are leaving. Most of all, I will miss Renee, our teacher with whom we attempted to speak German every day for fifteen weeks. At least she's on facebook--even though she only writes on my wall in German!

Last night we had our last keyboard skills "class"--our teacher decided that we ought to have a pizza party and watch the DVD "The Art of Piano". Three pizzas and three hours later, I had laughed harder and longer than I have in months. Nothing like spending an evening with your fellow piano freshmen (we are the entire freshman piano class this year). I'm glad the five of us will be sticking together next semester in Music 242: Accompanying. But we will really, really miss Kui.

I also had my last piano lesson of the semester today, which went quite well and was tons of fun as usual. This evening I had my fifteen minute jury practice time in Mills; my teacher was kind enough to stay late this evening to listen to me play and coach me a little. It was awesome playing on the 9-foot Steinway in Mills--what an incredible sound! It was heaven, playing all by myself in a big empty hall, with the sound echoing and bouncing around, rich and full and wonderful.

On Monday, I play my jury, which should be fine, and then I have my Musica Practica final, which will also be just fine. Tuesday all I have is my keyboard skills final; a little over five minutes of attempting to sight-read orchestral scores and transpositions. But I'm preparing everything I can prepare, and practicing all the time, and I'm not worried. Then, on Wednesday, home!

Class Registration and Snow

2007-12-01T17:27:00.001-06:00

It finally feels like winter; I woke up this morning to horizontal snow and several inches already on the ground. I bought myself a pair of winter boots at last (I couldn't put it off any longer) and enjoyed trudging through the snow on my way to Humanities to practice. Until, that is, the snow turned to ice pellets, sharp projectiles hurled from the heavens. Oh well. I'm inside now, warm, dry, and safe. I hope everyone is careful on the roads this evening. It's getting treacherous out there.

Yesterday, I registered for classes at last! It was a stressful morning--for the past two weeks, every student has been nervously checking online, hoping their classes don't close before their time to register. I woke up Friday morning, checked the website, and saw to my dismay that the German class I had selected had closed. I did another class search for German 102, and was surprised and horrified to see that not a single German 102 class was open. I was supposed to register in an hour, and I had no idea what to do. My advisor was unavailable, but I spoke to Bonnie, the undergrad admissions advisor whose office is right across the hallway from my advisor's office. She suggested calling the department, just to see what they could do. I wasn't sure what good calling the German department would do, but I had no other ideas, and I would be released to register at 9:40am, with no time to delay. I found the number for the German department, explained the situation, and was immediately transfered to the person in charge of the electronic timetable for the German classes. "Oh yeah, they're probably not really closed," he said. "I'll open up some spots for you." As if by magic, he changed all those blue squares to green circles! I couldn't believe it--I registered for all my classes online a few minutes later, and had my choice of German 102 classes. Very cool.

Microphone?

2007-11-27T20:27:00.000-06:00

This evening was our last rehearsal before the UW Band concert on Sunday. It was my first time playing in Mills Hall, and it went really well. The hall sounded a bit...mushy. I got more notes than ever before, but even when playing as loudly as I could, I could barely hear myself. Just the other evening, Professor Welbourne was talking about how difficult it is to project sound in that hall on that Steinway. I'll play Percy Grainger's "Children's March", but except for my solos, I don't think anyone will hear me over the eighty or so band instruments.

After rehearsal, I was walking back through Strelow Lounge, and I saw Kui, my keyboard skills teacher. "Practicing hard?" he asked. "No," I replied, "I just got out of a band rehearsal." "Oh! How's that going?"
"Really well, except, do you have any suggestions for playing louder than an eighty-person concert band?" I asked. I thought this was a great idea; Kui is one of the most incredible pianists I know--surely he would have some magical suggestion, a different way to think about my trapezius or move my elbows, or something.
"Do you have a mic?" he asked, and looked incredulous when I told him no, I was playing acoustic.

Oh well. It was worth a try. :)

I feel like a piano performance major...

2007-11-27T20:12:00.000-06:00

Today was great--long, busy, productive, fantastic. As my piano professor put it last week, "This time of year we start to see students turning a different shade of pale." But amazingly, I feel that I am in my element this month. I've always been odd, in that I enjoy tests and (usually) performances. I don't remember the last time I was actually nervous for a test. I recognize their importance, but I don't get that nasty butterflies-in-the-belly feeling. I have been known to get nervous after tests and performances, which is even stranger; I must have a delayed adrenaline response or something.

So, I have lots of work to do this December, but I feel happy and excited.

This morning I had a music theory lecture, followed immediately by an extra piano lesson. I don't think many students asked for make-up classes after Thanksgiving break, but I couldn't bear missing a lesson. I have way too much fun at my piano lessons. Then I went straight to my psychology lecture, which was all about depression and suicide. Which was kind of depressing. Oh well. Ten minutes after that I had my German class (two tests this week and an oral exam/project on Monday), followed by an hour break (which I spent on the phone with my advisor and practicing the piano), and then keyboard skills! Whew. I performed my Bartok, just the third movement, for the class, and it went quite well. Then I had my first real break of the day, grabbed some dinner at the cafeteria, and went straight back to Humanities Building for the UW Band dress rehearsal, which also went really well. And it was my first time playing in Mills Hall! Exciting!

Now I'm back in my room, finishing up a paper and studying German. Life is good.

Just a Few Things I'm Thankful For this Thanksgiving

2007-11-24T19:55:00.000-06:00

I am thankful for:

Mom, Papa, Eric.

Brad and Amy.

the Cnare family: Nan, Bill, Rebecca, Julie, (and Tony)
All my teachers.
Trust.
Bonnie Abrams and Patti Atwood.
Brown paper packages tied up with string. (giving and getting them)
Smoked salmon.
Unlimited cell phone minutes.

Thoughts on Thanksgiving Break

2007-11-24T19:44:00.000-06:00

I'm hanging out in my dorm room, listening to Debussy and Red Hot Chili Peppers (not at the same time), and getting lots of work done this evening. It's been a nice Thanksgiving break; I was a little homesick and lonely on Wednesday night, as the campus began to empty of students. On Thursday I had a fabulous dinner with my cousins (my dad's cousins and their daughters) here in Madison, where we ate a lot, told a lot of stories, and did an entire 500 piece puzzle. It was great to be with family. My parents reminded me that I'm half German, and I guess I've been enjoying getting back in touch with that heritage. My cousins added lefse to the traditional Thanksgiving dinner, potato tortillas that you eat with butter and sugar, or meat, and preferably Norwegian meatballs (which someday I will get to try). My refridgerator is now full of enough leftovers to keep me fed for a week, along with several packages of Alaskan smoked salmon that my parents sent! I snacked for dinner this evening, munching lefse and salmon. Yum.

I've been getting lots of work done, including a good start on my paper for Musica Practica. I had fun today studying over my coffee at Steep and Brew, practicing for four hours, and going for a nice walk. We've lost our snow, but it still feels crisp and cold.

I had a very nice surprise in the mail this afternoon--the Comfort-Waldorf family, some of my very best friends in Homer, sent me an amazing care package! It looks and feels like Christmas morning in my dorm room! It means so much, not just the presents, but the fact that someone cares enough to take the time to put together such wonderful gifts and send them to me. Thanks everyone!!!

Almost Thanksgiving

2007-11-20T21:47:00.000-06:00

The topic of conversation on campus all week is: When are you going home? A few of us are staying here this weekend, looking forward to a nice relaxing break with our dorm rooms to ourselves and unlimited sleep.

Today was a fun but busy day. I was a little nervous about my band rehearsal this evening; last week could have been better, but I practiced quite a bit and am developing a love-hate relationship with Percy Grainger (look him up on wikipedia if you want but be warned that it's not for the faint-hearted). I have a couple of exposed solos, which is a big deal when you're playing with an 80-person concert band. Amazingly, it went well this evening, I had fun, and I think I'll be ready for the concert on December 2.

I spent a lot of time in the Humanities Building today. I think I made five or six separate trips there. Tomorrow will be a very easy day; we're having a help/review section for music theory rather than our usual TA-lead discussions (Prof. Hyer wanted to give the TAs an extra day off), which will be fun. German also won't be very intense, as we're doing some review and going over any questions we have, and then the plan is to watch German television (e.g. commercials). Should be interesting.

I realized that I haven't been posting any photos. I don't have a camera here, but I have been googling UW and can post a few scavanged pictures.

That odd looking cinder block of a building is home sweet home Humanities, where I spend most of my waking and not-so-waking hours. It's so confusing that several of us have decided that it's like Hogwarts and changes periodically just to keep us getting lost.

That's Bascom Hill, and behind it is Bascom Hall (home of the Dean of Students and the Graduate Admissions Office, among other things). The hill is a great place to study in warm weather, and I've actually napped up there on the grass as well.

State Street. That's our capitol builidng back there, it's huge.

Last but not least: evening at Memorial Union terrace. Live music, warm nights, bratwurst and Babcock ice cream.

Masterclass and Other Things Involving Piano

2007-11-19T19:01:00.000-06:00

Today was a very interesting day. I like days that feel different--it's very easy to slip into a schedule that never changes, becoming even more rigid than necessary simply because we are creatures of habit. I find myself practicing at the same times every day, having my coffee at the same place at exactly the same time every day, walking to the same buildings in the same order, seeing the same people.

Today was different. I woke up at about 8am and wished I could keep sleeping forever. But I had a piano test in Musica Practica at 9:36, so I hustled down to the Humanities Building to warm up. Musica Practica test days are always fun (I'm weird; I like tests); the fourth floor hallway is lined with nervous freshmen clutching their sight-singing books. We each were scheduled for 6 minutes, but I went quickly and didn't redo anything, so my test lasted about 30 seconds. My chord progressions went well--we had to play several progressions and transpose them to the key of our choice. As most of the theory class are not pianists, I was sure our TA was hearing a lot of G major and F major. I did mine in A-flat and E-major, which he seemed pleasantly surprised by. My singing went well; all the pitches were fine, but I realized after finishing that I'd sung the very last measure using la-based minor solfege (but the correct major pitches!). I blushed and said the correct solfege quickly--I have no idea how that will affect my grade, but it was really more funny than distressing.

After my 30 second test, I went back downstairs and practiced for a couple hours, during the time usually occupied by theory class. That felt strange. I had a steamer at Starbucks (no caffeine on performance days) and went back to my room for a while until German class. German was fun, slightly confusing, and the entire class blushed and giggled continually for fifty minutes, as the current chapter is "Love and Friendship". It's been entertaining, and we've made a remakable number Deutsch faux pas. For example, you can't directly translated "I'm hot" or "I'm cold" to German. "Ich bin heiss", which we started saying during the section on weather, actually means "I'm sexually aroused", which has been causing a lot of giggling ever since.

After German, I walked back down Bascom Hill to Humanities, and warmed up on the piano for a while until masterclass. I finally played for masterclass! I went first, and played the third movement of my Bartok Suite. It was great fun to play on the big Steinway in Morphy Hall; I love being onstage. I wan't nervous, which surprised me. Naturally it wasn't perfect, but it went well enough, and it's always nice to get the first performance over with. I'm playing it again at Keyboard Skills; the more performing the better. And now I've finally played at masterclass!

Lazy Saturday

2007-11-17T12:43:00.000-06:00

I slept for thirteen hours straight last night...it felt amazingly good, not waking up until 11am. It's almost one in the afternoon, and I'm still in my pajamas and amazingly soft bathrobe my parents bought for me a couple of days ago. I've done all my German homework this morning, and I'm working up the energy to go out and practice for a while this afternoon.

I saw La Boheme last week, for the first time, at Overture Center. It was always my favorite opera, I'd just never seen it before. For days afterwards, I was humming arias and imagining Marcello or Rodolfo walking down State Street. It's the kind of opera that colors the way you perceive the world for a long time afterwards, changes how you play music, how you live, how you love.

Tomorrow I'm going to hear soprano Dawn Upshaw with the Madison Symphony. I'm very excited! Last night was fun; I practiced for a while, and then walked across the street to Music Hall to hear the student Opera Workshop, a student performance of single opera acts. It was great fun, a smorgasbord of opera, from Donizetti to Mozart.

It's getting colder here. It feels good, though I'm ready for snow now. Everyone complains about the cold, but I revel in it; it makes me feel alive.

I'd better get dressed. I haven't felt this lazy in weeks, but I suppose I'd better head to the practice rooms for the rest of the afternoon.

Kui Min rocks!

2007-11-09T17:27:00.000-06:00

Last night, my keyboard skills teacher Mr. Min, who is a third year doctoral candidate, played his lecture recital. As he had to cancel our class that day, the entire class (all five of us!) met outside the classroom at our usual time, and went out for dinner together. It was great fun to have a party with four other piano majors! Then we walked back to the Humanities Building and heard Mr. Min's lecture. The audience was small, but we made enough noise to sound like a full house, clapping and cheering and whistling for him before he even started.

The piece was Carl Vine's First Piano Sonata, an incredibly complex, modern piece (written in 1990). Mr. Min was absolutely amazing; we were completely blown away. It was fun to be there, to support our teacher, and to hear some of the most amazing music I have ever heard in my life. Kui Min rocks!

A small box of paperclips

2007-11-07T00:17:00.000-06:00

One of my classes, Keyboard Skills, involves a lot of sight-reading and score reading. Each class (twice a week) our teacher hands out packets of photocopied sheet music for us to sight-read and annotate during the week. Each packet has a colored paper clip, which we've been accumulating for the past nine weeks. We spread them around in the practice rooms, multicolored paperclip piles. Last Thursday, Mr. Min gave us our packets with plain metal paperclips, saying rather apologetically that he ran out of colored ones.

So this morning before class, I went to the University Book Store to seek out a box of colored paperclips as a present for our teacher. When I arrived at Keyboard Skills, I saw that this week's packets had no paperclips at all--and the first thing he said was that he had run out completely. I grinned broadly, reached into my backpack, and said, "Well, I bought you a present!" He was delighted, and my timing was apparently better than I had anticipated. He immediately opened the box and paperclipped (if that's a verb) our packets, smiling and thanking me, wondering aloud how I knew he had run out of paperclips that day.

It's wonderful to make someone happy with something so small. All it takes is a little attention, a little care, just the right thing at just the right time. What fun.

Last Night

2007-10-27T16:58:00.000-05:00

http://www.journalism.wisc.edu/J335/halloween/Friday.html

This is an article about how things went last night, which has been referred to as "the dress rehearsal" for Freakfest. Sounds like things were pretty tame--we'll see how it goes tonight.

Halloween Weekend Part 1

2007-10-27T14:26:00.000-05:00

If you want to read about the excitement and mayhem on State Street this weekend, you've come to the wrong blog. I am not leaving my dorm until tomorrow afternoon, except perhaps to poke my head out the door to see what's going on this evening (early evening). Halloween seems to have started already--my roommates went out in costume last night, and there was a continual roar of shouts, curses, and laughter from the street below, a textural, complex, incomprehensible sound that rose and fell in waves. Perhaps tonight I'll open my window and record some of it with my Minidisc recorder. Whenever I'm confronted with obnoxious and inescapable noise (all too common at a UW-Madison dorm), I think of a story told by John Luther Adams in his book "Winter Music". He writes of a time he was at a symposium with Pauline Oliveros. They were both listening to a discussion about aesthetics, which escalated into debate, and John found the rhetoric very frustrating. Pauline however grew calmer and "more beautific" as the debate became more heated. When the debate was over, John asked Pauline how she could be so calm "in the midst of all that nonsense". She replied with a smile that she wasn't listening to the words at all; she was enjoying the way the sounds resonanted and reverberated in the room."

This has become a trick of mine. When drunken freshmen are shouting and swearing right outside my door (which happens from time to time), I pretend that I cannot understand the words they are speaking, and instead I focus on the sound, the way the different pitches of the voices rise and fall, the way they blend together and echo down the hall. It actually becomes, if not soothing, at least interesting.

For this reason, I'm looking forward to tonight. There will be a huge crowd, so much more noise, so much more complexity. I have come to appreciate noise; there is music all around us, all the time, in silence (which according to John Cage cannot truly exist): (the following is a quote from Wikipedia)

In 1948, Cage joined the faculty of Black Mountain College, where he regularly worked on collaborations with Merce Cunningham. Around this time, he visited the anechoic chamber at Harvard University. (An anechoic chamber is a room designed in such a way that the walls, ceiling and floor will absorb all sounds made in the room, rather than bouncing them back as echoes. They are also generally soundproofed.) Cage entered the chamber expecting to hear silence, but as he wrote later, he "heard two sounds, one high and one low. When I described them to the engineer in charge, he informed me that the high one was my nervous system in operation, the low one my blood in circulation." Cage had gone to a place where he expected there to be no sound, yet sound was nevertheless discernible. He stated "until I die there will be sounds. And they will continue following my death. One need not fear about the future of music." The realization as he saw it of the impossibility of silence led to the "composition" of his most notorious piece, 4′33″.

Because silence cannot exist, what else is there for us to do but to listen to the sounds?

I'm Still Here

2007-10-25T22:33:00.001-05:00

Wow, it's been way too long since I've blogged...life here has been very busy, but that's no excuse.

Recent news, then. This last week I've been pushing the limits of how much I can practice every day--I was spending between five and six hours a day in the practice room (in 1.5-2 hour chunks), preparing for exams and several other things that have been piling up on me. I was asked by one of the conductors of the UW Band if I would play the piano part for Percy Grainger's "Children's March (Over the Hills and Far Away)"--it has a rather demanding piano part, and the UW band is mostly non-music majors. I got the music on Thursday, showed it to my teacher on Friday (who took a careful look at the score before giving me his approval to play) and played the first rehearsal on Tuesday. That's a lot of notes to learn in about four days, and I spent a lot of time deciding what was important, what were solos, and what to really focus on. The rehearsal went well--it was awesome to play with such a huge ensemble, and my part has some cool solos too.

Also, I was spending a lot of time preparing for my Keyboard Skills midterm, which was this evening. I think it went pretty well, actually--I was a little nervous, but the nice thing about piano is that we don't get "bow shakes". I played scales, arpeggios, chord progressions, sight read a string quartet and part of a Haydn symphony (from the full score), and improvised "Autumn Leaves" from a lead sheet. All of that in less than fifteen minutes, for a significant part of my grade.

I also had a couple of German tests this week, both of which went very well. And I had my midterm for Musica Practica (music theory) on Tuesday. I haven't gotten a grade for that one yet; another interesting test--all we had to do was write three counterpoint compositions in fifty minutes.

I've heard lots of concerts lately, and I'm especially looking forward to "Pelleas et Melisande" next Tuesday, performed by the UW Symphony and Opera. I've attended a few rehearsals, which was also quite interesting.

My family is in Anchorage this weekend--my dad is playing with the Anchorage Symphony, in a concert I would give just about anything to hear. The world premiere of a new violin concerto by Chris Brubeck, "Spontaneous Combustion", written for and performed by my favorite violinist in the whole world, Nick Kendall. I really wish I could be there...

And on a final note that I'll be returning to in the next few days: Halloween is Almost Here. I've alternated between terror, trepidation, and finally resignation. It will be whatever it will be. I'm coming home to my dorm room tomorrow and I don't plan to go out until Sunday. Saturday night is Freakfest, the scariest and potentially most violent, riotous night of the year. Madison is famous for its Halloween party, which unfortunately has turned into the police force's worst nightmare on several occasions. Increased security (we're talking huge numbers of police on horseback, on foot, and a big squad of privately contracted security workers) in the past few years has helped, but I keep hearing the horror stories of 2002. But I'm not going anywhere; I'll be besieged in my dorm room like Frodo against the orcs. I just hope there's something left of State Street when I emerge on Monday morning.

Please Don't Touch the Disklavier

2007-10-13T16:24:00.000-05:00

Today is turning out to be quite interesting, and I love it that it really feels like Saturday. I got ten hours of sleep last night, including some very interesting dreams (it was the first time I'd ever dreamed about the House on the Rock). My roommate and I went to the Farmer's Market together, and then I practiced the piano for a while.

At 1:30, I went upstairs to the third floor balcony of Humanities, overlooking the lobby. Professor Welbourne was already there starting to set up his installation for this afternoon; I and another of his students helped out this afternoon. Basically he's taken a video of Rubinstein playing Mendelssohn's "Spinning Song", and coordinated it with a MIDI version that is played back on a Disklavier (he played the Spinning Song himself on the Disklavier to get the MIDI file, and then synchronized it with the video). He integrated a camera with a motion sensing program into the whole thing, so when you stand in a certain place, the Disklavier plays, and when you stand at the other end of the piano, it switches over to the original audio recording. It's all seamless and very elegant.

It took us two hours to set everything up. In about ten minutes I'm going back for my shift of guard duty. Then there's a multimedia concert tonight, featuring the work of George Crumb, Charles Ives, James Tenney, and others (Prof. Welbourne is playing for part of the concert). Hopefully someone will volunteer to watch the equipment during the concert! I don't want to miss a minute of it.

Exams...

2007-10-09T22:18:00.000-05:00

It's the beginning of midterm season already...they're not too close together, thankfully, but I feel like I'm living from test to test these days. My first Psychology exam went well this afternoon; 60 multiple choice questions, of the sort where if you know the material, you're fine. If not, there's not much more you can do about it. I felt prepared, and certainly spent a lot of time studying, so we'll find out how I did in a week or so.

The four other students in my Keyboard Skills class were all twenty minutes late today, which meant I got a 20 minute private lesson with Mr. Min...I was almost disappointed when everyone else showed up eventually. I know it's common for college students to miss classes, but how about being the ONLY one to show up for class?

Among the things we were reminded of today was that our Keyboard Skills midterm is in two weeks, which means I'm going to be spending even more time in the practice room than usual. It should be an interesting exam: we have to sight read a score, a solo excerpt, be prepared to play any of the 24 scales and arpeggios (dominant sevenths and diminished) at quarter note=112 minimum tempo. Also, chord progressions and transpositions in any key, and we have to improvise "Autumn Leaves" from a lead sheet as part of our exam.

It was a busy, intense day, but despite the fact that I was tired when I woke up and didn't get back to my room until after 9 pm, I had fun. We started fourth species counterpoint in musica practica (music theory) today, and as always I enjoyed Professor Hyer's lecture.

Soon, to bed. Tomorrow should be fun; a bit less busy, and I get to hear Edgar Meyer tomorrow evening!!! Among other famous personalities coming to campus: Barack Obama will be here on campus on Monday, speaking at Memorial Union. Now I really feel like a college student!

Joshua

2007-10-07T21:46:00.000-05:00

I've heard some interesting music in the last few days. On Friday night, after a very long afternoon at College Library, I made a last-minute decision to go to a concert at the Memorial Union Theatre. I heard Anoushka Shankar, the daughter of world-renowned sitar player Ravi Shankar (who taught George Harrison how to play the sitar). It was absolutely incredible! I'd never heard a live sitar player, and she played an interesting combination of traditional, classical Indian music and some more modern interpretations. The second piece she played was a composition of her father's, written for Rostropovich. Anoushka Shankar played it with Rostropovich in Europe about ten years ago, and hadn't touched it since. Friday night was the first time it had been performed in the United States, and it was stunning. She had re-orchestrated it for sitar, piano, and flute, instead of sitar and cello. And I really enjoyed her composition that featured the "vocal percussion", which sounded like two mad chickens clucking furiously at each other at breakneck speed. Bizarre and impressive!

And last night, I heard Joshua Bell. Yes, he was just as handsome as they say he is, and yes, he played with a mastery, a genius that defies comprehension. It was difficult to believe it was actually him up there, on that stage at Overture Hall, difficult to believe I was actually hearing him in person. I think I started crying sometime during the overture (Rossini's La gazza ladra) and didn't stop until well into the Mussorgsky. The brevity of the experience added to the unearthliness; one moment he was there, so close and yet so distant, and then he was gone, only a memory, the sounds still reverberating in my ears.

I barely heard the Pictures at an Exhibition that comprised the second half of the program. It's not a piece I like much, and I was still hearing echos of the Corigliano, of the Bruch violin concerto.

After the concert, I made my way through the crowd of people (the concert was completely sold out). I found myself outside on State Street, stepping around the occasional drunk student and slipping quickly past the vociferous begging street people. Then I was back at home at Towers, having a rather listless conversation with my parents, unable to describe the concert or how I felt, still hovering somewhere far above the dirty street and the spilled beer in the elevator.

A brief note between classes

2007-10-01T12:02:00.000-05:00

Monday morning, the start of another busy week! I have a little time between classes, so I'd better catch up on the news of the week:

For those of you who have been listening to me complain about my 8 minute theory rudiments test that counts for 20 percent of my grade: I took it last week, and I got an A, which left me quite relieved. It also means I don't have to retake it (if you get a 38 or better out of a 40, you don't have to take the second part). Yay!

I've been going to quite a few concerts lately, and I've got a rather star-studded October ahead of me. This saturday I'm going to see Joshua Bell at Overture Center; the following week, Edgar Meyer; in November, La Boheme, and then Hilary Hahn! I saw the Madison Symphony Orchestra two nights ago at Overture Center with a fellow music student friend. It was stunning! They played the Barber "Toccata for Organ and Orchestra", on the gigantic pipe organ in Overture Hall, and Sibelius' 7th Symphony, Debussy "Nocturnes", and another organ piece I wasn't familiar, the Guilmant "Symphony No. 2" for organ and orchestra. The organist played an entire cadenza with his feet! The hall itself was stunningly beautiful; huge open spaces, dramatic architecture, modern and breath-taking.

Last night I heard another symphony concert (two in a row!); the UW Symphony's first concert of the semester. They played the Verdi "Overture to La Forza del destino", which was conducted by a (female) graduate student. Then James Smith took over for the Copland "El Salon Mexico" and Berlioz's "Symphonie Fantastique", which was quite creepy and gave me goosebumps all over.

I had a busy, intense weekend of lots of homework and practicing. I had another theory test this morning; sight reading some counterpoint, some sight-singing, and scales on the piano. It went pretty well--not perfect, but good enough. I didn't even get nervous singing for Steve, our stand-up comedian theory TA, who I believe subsists entirely on Oreos.

Okay, I'd better get back to work. So much homework, so little time!

8 Things I Learned This Week

2007-09-23T19:09:00.000-05:00

1. Don't eat anything if it comes with a half-inch of melted cheddar cheese on top. They're probably trying to hide what's underneath.
2. The French horn in Eb major transposes a major sixth below where it's written, not a minor third above.
3. In a first-species clausula formalis, the counterpoint almost always approaches the leading tone (the subsemitonum modi) by step from above.
4. The State Street Brat house serves breakfast.
5. You can visualize the alto clef as being sandwiched between the treble and bass clefs, with the middle line of alto clef forming middle C between the two, creating a giant composite clef.
6. The Starbucks peanut butter cookie is not worth the money. But the banana loaf is.
7. To find the concert key signature from a transposing instrument's part, add the key of the instrument to the key the part is written in (sharps and flats cancel each other out).
8. Germans hold the knife in their right hand and the fork in their left. I've started eating this way now, and it's a lot more efficient than the American way.

Students Against Highlighters!

2007-09-23T18:09:00.000-05:00

I spent the morning at Memorial Library, armed with a pencil and a big stack of Post-It notes (sticky notes, as I tend to call them). At my theory lecture about a week ago, Professor Hyer reiterated his dislike for highlighters, which most of us knew by hear-say already. "They sell those highlighters at the book store, in all kinds of garish colors. What do we do when we highlight?" Professor Hyer asked us. "We just change the color of the text!" he answered his own question. He applauded several students' use of Post-It notes to mark important sections, take notes, and put the text into our own words. The technique seems to be spreading throughout freshman Musica Practica. And I'm finding that it works remarkably well. Students Against Highlighters!

After my very productive three hours at the library, I bought myself a latte at Starbucks (a little luxury now and then can't hurt), and went over to the Humanities Building to practice. It was pretty deserted on a Sunday afternoon, and I managed to get practice room 1259 (the G above middle C is having sticking problems, but other than that it's as good as ever). I'm actually making progress, slowly but surely. My last piano lesson left me with much to think about and much to practice--a nice combination of mental and finger work. I don't have the triplets perfect or the release of the eighth note just right, but I understand what I'm trying to do.

A bit more studying to do this evening, and then the week starts all over again tomorrow!

By the way, we did win the game yesterday against Iowa.

Fat Cats Go Down Alleys Eating Birds

2007-09-22T10:37:00.000-05:00

Every day I spend an hour minimum--usually an hour and a half--practicing my music theory rudiments. I have an important test on Wednesday, eight minutes to identify and construct intervals, scales, and chords. It's not that it's difficult. But the timed nature of the test means that I have to have these skills in practice and completely automatic. It's not a test. It's a performance on paper. I'm not worried; my practice is paying off and I'm getting better every day.

Saturday morning. That means most of this university is still alseep and probably hung-over. It also means that most of this university will be at Randall Stadium this afternoon. We'll probably win. We usually do. I know absolutely nothing about football, but I'm loyal enough that I'll look up the score on the internet a few times this afternoon.

In a few minutes I'm going to head down to the cafeteria and see if I can find some edible breakfast, and then I'm going to the library. Then the rest of the day will be spent in a practice room.

Fliegen fliegen what?

2007-09-20T17:45:00.000-05:00

Among other interesting things learned today:

Wenn Fliegen Fliegen fliegen, fliegen Fliegen Fliegen nach.

That's a grammatically correct sentence in German, and it means "When flies (the insect) follow flies, flies will fly behind flies.

I got my German tests back today--I got an A on the first one (missed half a point out of 40 points) and an A on the second one (100% correct). We started chapter two today!

...

I bought myself an expensive present today. I spent $38 on a ticket for the Joshua Bell concert in October, a promotional concert with the Madison Symphony Orchestra (hence the absence of a student discount). I still have to miss out on seeing Nick Kendall in Anchorage, but this almost makes up for it. Almost.

Simple Pleasures in the life of a College Music Student:

2007-09-18T18:46:00.001-05:00

1. Tall skinny lattes
2. Practice room 1259 (ah, a Steinway that's in tune!)
3. The dining hall at University House Highlander
4. masterclass in Morphy Hall
5. Bratwurst and sauerkraut at the State Street Brat House
6. Getting through a whole day without getting lost in the Humanities Building.
7. Opening my mailbox with the combination lock all by myself.
8. Concerts are free with Student ID
9. Babcock ice cream
10. cheese curds (squeaky ones)
11. Unlimited cell phone minutes
12. Wireless Internet
13. Used textbooks
14. Walking down Bascom Hill.

Sleeping in...

2007-09-16T09:57:00.001-05:00

...I love the weekend. I love going to the Farmer's Market on Saturday morning, the long line of vendors selling everything from apples and honey to giant dried gourds to cheese curds to ostrich meat (which tastes a bit odd, by the way). I love having my own schedule, for two whole days; I can practice when I want, for as long as I want, and spend hours at the library without worrying about squeezing it in between classes. Tomorrow is Monday, and it will be a busy week, but it's so nice to have one more day to study, finish up my homework, and relax a bit.

I've been to two concerts in the last two days--both were absolutely phenomenal. The one on Friday night featured Christopher Taylor on piano and Stephanie Jutt on flute; they played variations: the Gieseking variations on a theme by Grieg, the Schubert variations on a theme from "Trockne Blumen", and the 1982 Robert Beaser Variations for Flute and Piano. About a third of the way into the Thema of the Gieseking, tears filled my eyes and I had goosebumps all over. It was magical. I could not believe how such sounds could be produced by humans, such spine-tinglingly wondrous music.

Last night's concert was a bit more conservative, but absolutely charming. Martha Fischer and Bill Lutes played Schumann and Brahms, works for two pianos or four hand duet. The Schumann 12 Four-Hand Piano Pieces for Small and Big Children was delightful, the Andante and Variations for Two Pianos, Four hands was lovely. My favorite was after intermission, though. Schumann before intermission, Brahms after. And there is something wonderful about hearing Brahms on two pianos...the fullness, the richness, the deliciousness of the sound.

I had my second piano lesson on Friday. It went very well--I played the Bach E major Prelude, and now I'm working on the Fugue as well. And we started counterpoint in music theory on Thursday--fun! I have a German test tomorrow that I have to study for, just a little bit, and a writing assigment for Keyboard Skills due tomorrow night. So I'd better get to work!

Happy Friday

2007-09-07T19:26:00.001-05:00

I made it through my first week of college classes! And to tell the truth, it was fantastic. Every class, every discussion, every professor and TA are really wonderful.

Theory (Musica Practica, a combination of analysis, form, harmony, counterpoint, and aural skills) is demanding and challenging, but I'm learning a lot very quickly. The sight-singing with solfege syllables is a fast learning curve for me, but I'm getting better every day. So far, we're just getting ready for another of those "If you don't pass this test you can't continue as a music major" tests, which is on September 26. Needless to say, I'm spending a lot of time drilling my key signatures and intervals (visual and aural recognition).

Keyboard skills is going to be quite interesting (six of us, in a piano lab with 12 pianos!). Sight-reading, technical skills, score reading, and lots of duets. We're looking for a piece for six pianos, so if you know of any good ones, let me know.

German is moving along quickly. My one semester of German in high school is quite helpful, and I'm really enjoying the opportunity to speak German in class, even if it is only a few words and phrases so far.

Psychology hasn't really gotten going yet--our first lecture was mostly orientation, and the second "lecture" was a mass survey for extra credit; the entire class time was taken up by answering a lot of wierd questions ranging from "Do you like to hold and pet kittens?" to "Have you ever had the sensation that one of your arms or legs was larger than normal?" Our "real" lectures begin this Tuesday.

Last and definitely not least, I had my first piano lesson today! My teacher, Professor Todd Welbourne, is extremely nice, not too intense, and a wonderful teacher. I played the first movement of Bartok's "Suite, Opus 14" that I've been working on quite intensely lately. My lesson was scheduled for 50 minutes, and he taught me for an hour and a half! I wasn't too nervous, and it went really well. He even complimented me on my "relaxed playing", something Karin Strid and I had been working on for a long time. I can't wait until my next lesson!

Rest Day

2007-09-02T12:31:00.000-05:00

Today and tomorrow I'm going to take it easy (though I'm still trying to finish my psychology book before Tuesday). I had a nice evening yesterday; I had dinner at the Union, hung out outside reading until it got dark, and then I attended the New Student Free Movie Night. They showed "The Italian Job", and it was nice to meet some new people and have some passive entertainment.

This morning I ate breakfast by the lake, studied a bit, and am generally taking it easy. I may go to the University Bookstore party for new students tonight (I already have all my books, but there will be free food, and things to learn and do, and free food), and to the Union Bash at Memorial Union tonight. Tomorrow there's a concert at Mills Hall that I'm looking forward to, a cello and piano concert that looks like fun. And then, at last, classes start.

My roommate moved in a few days ago, and so far we're getting along great.

Return to Reflection

2007-08-31T17:22:00.000-05:00

I must be getting settled in, because yesterday I noticed a change in my feelings and attitude: I seem to have switched out of the excited, happy, running-on-adrenaline freshman, to my usual reflective, slightly introverted self. For the first time since I got here, my surroundings do not occupy all of my attention. I am able to move at a slower pace now, to reflect, to be once again as aware of my Self as of my Place, and to begin to integrate the two. It was oddly a sudden change, or at least my awareness was sudden. And I find with surprise that I am still the same person. I haven't changed a bit. Somehow, I expected to change, as my Place has changed so profoundly. But I'm still Me. What an odd thing dislocation is!

Perhaps I am also feeling a bit homesick, because I'm eager for classes to start, eager to really begin work (though I'm practicing four hours a day now and studying about as long, things will change when classes start). Maybe I want the distraction, want to be either by myself or around fellow musicians or professors. I must try not to focus too much on myself; an easy thing to do as a college student, when your only obligation is to yourself, when the objective is simply to follow your dream. Still, it isn't easy to spare much mental energy. Soon, classes will start, there will be concerts and teachers and music, and my batteries will be recharged.

...

I went to the Chancellor's Convocation today, down at the Kohl Center (which is much closer to my apartment than I thought it was). About 5,000 of the 6,000 freshman showed up. The Chancellor recognized the states that contributed the greatest number of freshman in the class of 2011, but he also listed the states that contributed only one student. And guess what? I'm the only Alaskan student in my entire, 6,000 student freshman class. I got to stand up in my seat and wave, and I got plenty of applause. Awesome.

Spending Money, Exploring, and an LP

2007-08-28T20:06:00.000-05:00

If yesterday was a busy day, today was an expensive day. I bought things today. First I bought my printer this morning, which, including ink and paper, cost me $88. Not bad. Then I stood in line for about 45 minutes to rent my practice room for the year. That cost $115. Then I bought all my textbooks, which cost about $320. Then I paid my room and board for two months, which was about $1800. Sigh. At least these are things that will last me a while. In a way, it was nice to get all the buying things taken care of at once, and I'm really glad I got my textbooks before resident move-in tomorrow. There were still plenty of everything, but that won't be the case the day before classes start.

Plus I splurged and bought the recommended books as well as the required ones. But I did get used books whenever possible.

I had lunch at the "Mediterranean Cafe" with a new friend of mine from the music department, and then, having not much to do this afternoon, I went exploring. I walked all the way from State Street to the School of Agriculture, the Microbial Sciences, Genetics, and Engineering buildings. I even walked past Randall Stadium, which is humongous, and I haven't been inside yet. There's a game on Saturday, but they've been sold out since July. I'll go to a football game eventually, I'm sure.

I wandered back, exhausted in the heat and humidity, and enjoyed a few minutes' rest in the air conditioned Union. Then I decided to go to the library.

I'd been on a tour of the Mills Music Library, but I hadn't been down there by myself yet. So I took the elevator to the basement, and then spent several hours wandering around among the scores and books, in heaven, surrounded by music. I decided to try out the audio collection, so I did a search for "John Luther Adams". They have everything he's ever recorded! I picked the 1982 Opus One LP of "A Northern Suite", the Fairbanks Symphony, Gordon Wright conducting, and wrote down the call number. Then I went to the desk, requested the LP, and a moment later the librarian returned, handed me the LP and a pair of headphones, and showed me how to use the turntable.

It made me rather homesick, I'll admit it, listening to that recording. It was the first time I'd ever heard "A Northern Suite", and it was the first thing I ever listened to at the Music Library. And I'm here at Madison, where Gordon studied conducting... it was the strangest feeling, sitting there, so far from home, looking at the liner notes with photos of Gordon and John and the Fairbanks Symphony in 1982, listening to the music. I know Gordon would be thrilled if he knew I was here.

Dinner this evening was a Luau--themed outdoor barbecue in the parking lot of Towers and Statesider, right outside the front door. I ate more than enough free meatballs, sweet potatoes, and fruit shishkabobs, and a small piece of a bizzare cake that I think was frozen banana and whipped cream, but I'm not entirely sure. Then I allayed my only slightly guilty conscience (I did have a long walk this afternoon) I worked out in the gym downstairs for an hour, and retired to my room, happy to be sitting still, in an air-conditioned room, with my new textbooks to read and a blog to keep up with.

Music Orientation

2007-08-27T19:46:00.000-05:00

My second day here today. I woke up about 7 am this morning, had a latte and a scone at the "Sunroom Cafe", and then made my way over to the Humanities Building. I found room 2441, and took my diagnostic theory exam along with about fifteen other students. The test was pretty easy--interval recognition by ear, melodic dictation, identifying key signatures, writing and reading intervals, and a very easy score analysis (identify the cadence types in a string quartet excerpt). Then we had several hours of orientation, introductions and information given by music faculty and our advisor. I also got a chance to meet the piano faculty, including my private instructor and my piano pedagogy and keyboard skills professors. I'm looking forward to working with Professor Todd Welbourne, who will be my private teacher.

After the music orientation was over (about 3 pm), I returned briefly to my room, and then spent an hour and a half trying to find the Office of the Registrar. I finally found it, way down by the Welcome Center, on the 7th floor--two vet students were trying to find it as well, so we searched together. Finally, after asking for directions at the new Ogg Hall, we found it, and I got some paperwork taken care of. It seemed like a long way to walk for a signature and a stamp!

By that time it was 4:30 pm, and my theory exam results were set to be posted at 5 pm back in the Humanities building. So, I walked up to the Union, bought a Babcock ice cream cone, and then did a little bit more school supply shopping at the University Bookstore.

A few minutes after 5pm, I returned to room 2441 at the Humanities Building, and was pleased to see my name on the sheet on the door that listed those who passed the exam. I ate dinner at the cafeteria, and then returned to my room for a couple hours of researching my classes, finding and beginning registration for my theory and aural skills classes, and making a list of the textbooks I'll need to buy before classes start.

I'm getting sleepy now...listening to Beethoven's 6th symphony and thinking about going to sleep soon. Tomorrow I'm going on a tour of the music department, signing up for my practice room, and maybe I'll walk down to the tech store and buy myself a printer!

I'm Here!

2007-08-26T16:54:00.000-05:00

Today was my first full day at the University of Wisconsin. I arrived yesterday after a red-eye flight from Anchorage, went to Target with my cousins, and moved in to my apartment. Last night, after doing some laundry and eating free pizza in the lobby, I slept incredibly well.

This morning I found a great latte (I love living on State Street!), went to the University Bookstore, and took a nice long walk around campus. I walked up Bascom Hill, down to University Avenue, up to Memorial Union by the lake, and then back to State Street again, where I drank lemonade and took a look at my schedule for tomorrow.

Tomorrow is the first busy day here for me--I take a theory exam at 8:45 am, and then I have a full day of music orientation, where I'll hear lectures and advice, meet the conductors of the ensembles and orchestras, and meet my piano professor, Todd Welbourne. On Tuesday I can sign up for my practice room, which means I don't have to practice in the movie theatre on the first floor of my apartment building anymore.

It was a beautiful day here, and I enjoyed wandering around over the lawns and under the big oak trees. Rather than eat at the cafeteria downstairs tonight, maybe I'll head over to Memorial Union and sit outside by the lake.

I think I'm still running on adrenaline. I know I should be exhausted, both from the long trip and from the huge change that I've made by coming here. I'm excited, happy, and looking forward to tomorrow.

The Wisconsin Idea

2007-08-22T19:54:00.000-05:00

http://www.homertribune.com/article.php?aid=2035
My latest Homer Tribune article was published today.

...

Almost finished packing...my mother and I bought some clothes for me at the Homer Gear Shed--basically the only place I can find anything to wear in Homer--and packed most of my clothes. I still have much to do, but I'm getting underway. I felt pretty overwhelmed today, nervous for the first time, realizing how soon it is that I'll be leaving. But life is like playing music--all you can do is go on to the next measure, the next movement, the next chord.

UW-Madison housing shortage article

2007-08-20T20:49:00.000-05:00

I was interviewed by an AP journalist over the phone a few days ago while I was in Fairbanks; the journalist said he was writing a story about the housing shortage at the University of Wisconsin, and received my name and phone number from University Housing. I didn't really expect any of my comments to appear in the story, but my dad's cousin Nan emailed us the story, which was published this morning and does contain a few things about me. Pretty cool.

It's an AP story, so it was published in several papers in Wisconsin. One is here: http://www.madison.com/tct/news/206297

...

I got back from Fairbanks last night, after an uneventful flight home. I miss John and Cindy, but I'm excited to be heading off to school at the end of the week!

Distracted by memories and Mint Tea

2007-08-15T23:11:00.000-05:00

It's a beautiful evening here in Fairbanks; the rainy, misty morning has given way to dark-light, golden rays of sunlight through the birch trees, with dark clouds in the distance. I had a good day--a long day, but a very good day.

Cindy fed me dinner tonight, and the food was incredible! Ethiopian, which we ate with our fingers and small thin crepe-like cakes.

I pulled out my laptop after dinner, checked my email, and thought I'd blog a little bit. I started idly reading through my blog archives, and ended up reading all the posts I'd written about Gordon and about John. It was fun to look back at my initial reaction to "Forest Without Leaves", and my first impressions of John's music. I reflect on how much I've learned since then. And of course, there was the nostalgia of reading about my time on Turnagain Arm with Gordon last summer...

I am truly fortunate to have spent such wonderful summers with such incredible people. I wish my time with Gordon could have been longer, but I could not have wished for better time spent. I'm glad we took advantage of the time we had, and I am glad that I cherished each day. I'm cherishing each day I have here, in this place, with John, with this music. Very soon my life will take another turn; I'm heading off to college so soon, with such a sudden change.

And it makes me so happy to know that I can take the music with me. Not just "In The White Silence" and "The Far Country of Sleep" and "Make Prayers to the Raven", but also the memories of the songs of birds in the morning, the wind in the trees, the sound of stillness in the evenings as I walk home from the studio. I'll have that music forever, too, along with the CDs and the scores and the sheet music I'm taking home with me.

John just set a cup of mint tea down on the table next to my laptop. It's the most incredible color--no, so many colors--so many shades of delicate green, all layered and reflecting the light. "John, this is the most amazing color!" I say. "It's so many layers, so many shades. It's like your music!" He laughes. "That's why I bring you tea!" he says. "Because you say things like that." I laugh, and take a sip. It tastes just as good as it looks. Sounds. Is.

Another Beautiful Day in Fairbanks

2007-08-11T17:35:00.000-05:00

I love the weather here; from the torrential rain to the brilliantly sunny days. Someday I'm going to come up here in the winter, to get a real sense of Fairbanks. But this summer has been absolutely spectacular. I'm sitting outside on John's porch right now, enjoying his wireless internet and the cloudless sunny day. I worked in the studio this morning, practiced the piano for two and a half hours (and I'm making progress on "Nunataks"), and then gave the studio back to John, who is doing some "real" work this afternoon. So, I have the rest of the day off. I have no idea what I'll do, but I'm sure I'll enjoy the afternoon.

I leave here a week from tomorrow; it's amazing how quickly the time has gone by. For the rest of the week, John and I are going to focus less on the archiving/organizing, which is basically finished until we get the rest of our boxes and furnature in the mail (which won't happen before I leave). There are still a few projects left for me to do, and I'll help him out with any business or secretarial tasks than I can.

I feel like I'm getting my piano chops back again; I'm revisiting my Mozart piano concerto, learning Nunataks, continuing to chip away at that infernal Bartok suite, and beginning to look at "Make Prayers to the Raven", the small ensemble piece for violin, cello, flute, piano, and percussion.

I'm soaking in the sun, the gentle breeze that rustles the leaves on the birches and aspens, and the soft faraway tinkling of wind chimes in the garden. I'm learning so much from just being around John, and one of the things he's reminded me of is the importance of listening. It's a deeper sense than most of us are aware. Lately, I'm much more acutely aware of sounds around me, noticing how rare it is to hear true silence. For the first time in my life, I hear the rhythmic and tonal complexity of the wind, the birds, the sound of my footsteps as I walk up the trail. Always listen. Always listen.

The End of Summer?

2007-08-08T23:03:00.000-05:00

I can't believe how quickly the weather changes here. It's getting cooler, the nights are starting to feel more like nights and less like slightly darker days. And there's a "late summer" feeling about the air. I guess it happens more quickly in these northern latitudes. The weather is absolutely perfect today, sunshiny but not hot, fresh and clear.

I had a long day at the studio today, but it was very productive. Still, it felt good to walk out the door at the end of the day. When John and I walked through the front door of his house, I saw that the kitchen table was set for three--Cindy had already cooked dinner for the three of us, a pleasant surprise that means that I ate more delightful food and didn't have to cook left-overs at Belfair tonight. John and Cindy are taking pretty good care of me. Hard to complain.

I lost my mechanical pencil about three days ago. I was slightly upset, as it has been my pencil since I started my calculus book (and finished it, too), my constant companion for many words. I was starting to mourn for it, when it turned up during breakfast at Belfair on Sunday. Matt found it, on top of the cottage cheese, in the refridgerator. Huh. I'm glad to have it back, and that's really the last place I would have looked.

I'm off to bed soon, hopefully I'll get an early start again tomorrow. We're awaiting the arrival of our new archival boxes, so I look forward to the UPS truck with great eagerness.

A quick post

2007-08-06T20:25:00.000-05:00

I've been terrible about keeping up with my blog--it seems like my time on the internet these days has been a checklist, things to do for work, and then I log off and it's time to head out the door. I have a few minutes here, not near enough time to catch up on all the news.

It's been raining non-stop for three days now, and today is the most wet it's been. I got completely soaked this morning, took two hours to dry out, and then promptly got drenched again. Still, I like it, so long as I don't have to walk too far in it.

I turned 18 years old on August 3rd! So, I'm not a minor anymore. I guess that makes me a major. My theory: when we're born, we're diminished. Then we're minors for a while. Then we turn 18 and we're majors. Then we become augmented in middle age. And when we get really old, we're demented! (apologies to all music theorists out there, especially you, Karen).

John gave me a score for one of his new piano pieces for my birthday. It's called "Nunataks", or "Solitary Peaks"; it's a little tricky, but not horribly difficult. It's slow, expansive, dramatic, like the landscape. I've been having fun playing it over the last few days. And the piano in the studio was tuned the other day, so I'm very happy!

There's something about this place, this weather, the music I'm listening to constantly, the time alone in the studio, that's so relaxing. I feel the least stress or anxiety about college, life, work, that I have in so long. I feel a fundamental happiness, a feeling that "everything is good"; I know it won't last, and that my school worries will come right back as I realize how soon I leave for Madison. But I'm enjoying it for now, enjoying every day.

JLA

2007-07-26T21:37:00.000-05:00

Well, I've finally slowed down from 500 mph and come down from 34,000 feet at last, settling for the moment in Fairbanks Alaska. Right now I'm sitting at a glass dining room table, in front of a glass railing, in a room that has huge glass windows on all sides. I've got John Luther Adams' house to myself for the evening, a brief respite before I get back to work.

I haven't blogged since my trip to Madison, which went perfectly. It was a long trip, but very productive. I'm now registered for all of my classes (except music theory, which has to happen in the fall), I've been oriented, and am pretty comfortable with the campus and what's going to happen in the fall. I love the midwest, especially Wisconsin!! It gets dark at night, which is...a bit strange during the summer. And I counted fireflies, which made my dad laugh.

My dad and I visited the House on the Rock, Alex Jordan's bizarre creation in Spring Green, Wisconsin. If you've never seen it, you absolutely must. It was the strangest experience in my life. Neil Gaiman described it the best in his book American Gods, though when I first read it, I thought he was making it up. Nope, I discovered that every word was true, from the world's largest carosel to the giant mechanical orchestra.

After our return to Homer, I had exactly one day, July 23rd, to pack for my month in Fairbanks. I flew to Fairbanks the next morning, 5:55 am on July 24th. I'll be here until August 19th. I'm staying at a big house called Belfair, a ten minute walk from JLA's house and studio. I'm renting one room, but I have the use of the kitchen and effectively the whole house. There are currently five of us living there, soon to be six tomorrow. It's a combination hostel/hippie community/grad student haven. My housemates right now are all grad students in either the natural or social sciences. The fellow I spent yesterday evening with is working on his thesis, getting his master's in cultural anthropology, specifically rural Russian cultures. There's also a graduate student vulcanologist, and one or two others I'm not sure about yet.

As to my work for JLA, things seem to be going well. We're going through his life's work, every score, every page, every sketch, archiving, cataloging, and organizing. It's a bit overwhelming sometimes, especially for John, but we're tackling it, and I'm to the point now where I can do some work there by myself.

And now, I had better get back to my work. I finished doing the note entry for Forest Without Leaves this morning, but as always, there's more proofreading to do before I send it to John's copyist.

How to Hold a Violin

2007-07-10T11:40:00.000-05:00

My father wrote a very scholarly article on How to Hold a Violin. He examines the use of shoulder pad versus shoulder rest versus no rest, as well as the contact points of the instrument on the body and how contact shifts during playing, and even discusses the weight of the arm and violin. I did the illustrations--my first illustration job. The drawings are ink washes on bristol board.

Laurie Niles, the editor of violinist.com has kindly published the article on her fantastic website devoted to the violin. If you have any interest in violins or violin technique, I really encourage you to check out both our article and violinist.com.

Camping on Glacier Spit

2007-07-07T22:46:00.000-05:00

I got back late last night from camping on Glacier Spit, across Kachemak Bay, with my mother, brother, and some friends of ours. My dad dropped us off from the skiff, and we met up with the rest of our group, who kayaked across from the Homer Spit (a 3 to 4-hour trip, apparently). It was gray and rainy the first day--my friend and I hung out in the tent all afternoon, drawing and sleeping. I also wrote 1 and a half new fiddle tunes, which I put the finishing touches on today.

We had a nice campsite, though it was a bit buggy (I'm still discovering mosquito bites today). The next day, we all hiked up to Glacier Lake, at the base of Grewink Glacier. It was awesome to emerge from the trees and see the big glacial lake spread before us, with lots of big icebergs floating in it. It's an easy hike, only about 3.5 miles one way, and I highly recommend it if you haven't been there.

We decided not to stay two nights, and my dad picked us up off the spit last night. It was a stunningly beautiful evening, though a bit choppy. I was happy to get home and rinse the sand out of my hair. I forgot my camera--darn it--but several other people took lots of photos, so I'll post some when I get a chance.

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My first-ever string quartet composition had it's world premiere today! It started as a fiddle tune I wrote, called the "Cape Chacon", inspired by the story of a fishing boat that sank back in the '80s. I couldn't leave the tune alone, and I wrote a string quartet based on the same theme. It has a slowish introductory, rather melancholy, section in 3/4 time, followed by the more intense fiddling in 4/4, and a mournful ending that goes back to 3/4 time again. A string quartet here in Homer (all students of my parents') learned it and performed it at the Farmer's Market this morning.

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Also, I'm spending lots of time on Facebook lately, so if you have a page, friend me!

Two drawings

2007-06-30T14:03:00.000-05:00

I'll write a real post later today. For now, here are some (relatively) new drawings. I've been in a bit of a slump with my art for the past few weeks. Uninspired, I guess. I think I'm starting to get it back again--and a few hours of drawing each day doesn't hurt either! The pencil drawing on the left is an older drawing that I only recently photographed. I like the minimalist shading, and I don't usually work in pencil, which was a nice change. The one on the right of the dashing young man in a tux I finished yesterday. It felt good to get some spontaneous, bold strokes in there.

Latest Tribune column

2007-06-27T20:42:00.000-05:00

Yet another Homer Tribune column published in the paper today: http://www.homertribune.com/article.php?aid=1820

Guess what it's about.

the Mona Lisa in Microsoft Paint

2007-06-26T19:22:00.000-05:00

Wow, the Mona Lisa done in Microsoft Paint, apparently it only took 2 hours and 30 minutes...amazing. (my embedding attempts seem to have failed, so here's a link)

http://video.yahoo.com/video/play?vid=450851&cache=1

A quick one

2007-06-25T19:25:00.000-05:00

I'm using a friend's computer for a few minutes this afternoon, and thought I'd post a quick update. My dad and I just got in to Anchorage from Fairbanks--it was a nice trip, the drive went smoothly, and the concert and memorial for Gordon went very well. I played percussion, my "debut" at Davis Hall, as well as the first time I have ever played percussion with an orchestra, the first time I ever played under Linn Weeda, and the first time I ever performed in public on snare drum.

I had a feeling I'd have to play snare. The part was easy, thankfully, and there's a first time for everything! I got a chance to meet Peter Asimov at last, a very young and very promising concert pianist. Gordon had told me a lot about him, and I had been looking forward to hearing him play and meeting him. He played phenomenally. I only wish that Gordon could have introduced me to his friends and family, and that we could have met under different circumstances.

I also met violist David Harding for the first time--he and I almost shared Gordon's guest cabin for a week last fall, which would have been a lot of fun. At least I got to meet him this time. It was great seeing Paul Rosenthal, of course, and John Luther Adams as well. I'm looking forward to returning to Fairbanks in August to work for John.

My dad and I return to Homer tomorrow, and I'll post again and with more details then.

A few things

2007-06-21T19:22:00.000-05:00

I've been feeling guilty again about not blogging. I had a nice surprise the other day when I found out that Maddy Gaiman is updating her dad's blog for the week; picture the very excited teenage daughter of a brilliant English author living in America. I love Neil's writing and his blog is great fun, an unusual peek into the daily life of an author. But I must admit I'm enjoying Maddy's posts just as much!

I'm pleased to announce that I am no longer homeless. I found out only two weeks ago that all of the dorms at the University of Wisconsin Madison are full. I spent quite a bit of time frantically searching for an apartment, and managed in the end to get a very nice room in a large, privately owned "dorm-ish" place called the "Towers", part of the University House program. It's a little pricey, but the security, closeness to the campus, and reputation makes it well worth it.

For those of you are are interested, I'm now on facebook. Please friend me.

My dad and I are driving to Fairbanks tomorrow for the weekend to play for a memorial concert for Gordon Wright. I'll be back in the percussion section, pretending I know what I'm doing. I made my mother teach me how to play the snare drum today, just in case I have to play snare. I think I'll only have to worry about xylophone and cymbals. It will be quite an interesting orchestra--much of the concert will be chamber music, played by the Sitka Music Festival musicians and others, who will also make up a good part of the orchestra. They're calling it "The Gordon Wright Celebration Orchestra", which sounds nice. I'll be home on Tuesday.

I'd better go finish my Tribune column, which is due tomorrow. And I have to pack.

The Internet Is Cool.

2007-06-09T11:38:00.001-05:00

I mean, you knew that. But yesterday I activated my account at My-UW Madison(http://www.wisc.edu/) and was presented with what is basically a personalized web site (not just one page, a whole site), and saw that I could keep track of all my classes, plan my schedule, register for all of those things that need registering for, see updated university news, and even collect some RSS feeds from other parts of the site, all on my very own custom page.

I get my own brand-new email address--I always dreamed of having an email address that ends "@wisc.edu"--and I can check my email online with a page that looks suspiciously like ACSalaska webmail. I even have something called "My Webspace", which appears to be a way to upload contacts, files and documents, and other things to My-UW--I haven't figured out exactly how it works yet, but it will merit further investigation.

Then, as I'm searching through all of this stuff, I realize that there are about 41,000 of us students at the University of Wisconsin-Madison, and I think how much paper it would take to keep track of all of us, if we didn't have Information Technology. And well, the Internet is pretty cool.

Accepted!

2007-06-06T17:47:00.000-05:00

I got an early-morning phone call and an email from the University of Wisconsin-Madison, telling me that they would accept my late enrollment after all. So, I'll be going to UW-Madison this fall!

It's a huge relief to have the waiting and wondering over with. For now, anyway. Now, the matter of registration and starting to plan my college life.

Thinking in 3 dimensions, and Checking My Email A Lot

2007-06-04T11:39:00.000-05:00

I got a lot of fabulous graduation gifts from my friends last week; a very special one was a 4-hour-long portrait sculpture lesson from a fine sculptor who lives here in Homer. I have come to know him and his family, and they are among my very best friends here.

My dad and I arrived at his studio at 1 pm yesterday; Jeff said he would do a demonstration portrait of my dad, and then I would attempt to do the same thing. After rolling out large lumps of water-based pottery clay, and twisting wire and small pieces of wood together to form an armature, Jeff began by building up some clay where the neck and center of the head would be. Then, looking closely at my dad, he stuck three of the smaller rolls together to form a U-shaped piece exactly the same size and character as my dad's jaw. This he placed on the clay head, using his thumbs to shape the chin perfectly. The remarkable thing was, every piece of clay he added was the right size and shape, and with only the roughest outline now of my father, I could see a likeness already. Then he took two smaller, thinner rolls of clay and used them as the upper and lower "lips", actually forming the upper and lower halves of the maxilla, again perfectly spaced and proportioned. He took another of the rolls of clay, pointed one end of it, and placed it vertically on the face. The pointed end became the nasal septum, and the roll was shaped in an instant into the nose and beginning of the forehead.

At this point, he turned the head, and my dad, sideways, to work on the profile. Without regard to the depth of the portrait, he "drew" the profile with small adjustments and pieces of clay, so that from the side, it was a two-dimensional likeness. Then he turned to the back, and added a "cross piece", perpendicular to the profile, which defined the width of the head. Then, back to the front, he added the brow and cheek bones; with these pieces in place, we saw a partly fleshed-out skull, showing perfectly and directly each plane of the face, with some parts left unfinished. The fully fleshed out profile acts as a reference from which to base every other addition.

It took Jeff perhaps two hours to nearly complete the portrait--he left it at a rough but accurate stage. Then Jeff's son, who was learning as well, and I set up our armatures and piled up the rolls of clay, and set to work. I did my dad again, who was exceeding patient and learned the inside of the studio quite well from every angle. Jeff's son did a portrait of his brother.

I tried to set up my portrait in the same steps that Jeff had, occasionally asking for instruction and reminders on what to do next. Mine did not look quite right from the beginning, but I put the pieces on in the right order, and after about two hours, mine was a rough and sort-of-kind-of recognizable likeness. Like most first attempts in a new medium and with a new method, the point of the exercise was to learn the method, rather than produce a work of art. Still, I was not disappointed nor discouraged, and I think this is something I would like to master someday.

...

Meanwhile, I'm checking my email too often this weekend, waiting for a message that I know won't come until later today or tomorrow or later this week... I gave up being anxious or nervous about getting into UW-Madison this year, and decided just to be patient. Now, Monday morning rolls around, and I'm back to being anxious and nervous again. I need to stop checking my email every ten minutes today...

Tribune column

2007-05-30T18:06:00.000-05:00

My latest Tribune column was published today:

http://www.homertribune.com/article.php?aid=1703

Wow...

2007-05-30T17:53:00.000-05:00

Well, I haven't blogged in a month. I graduated from high school last week, no ceremony, no pomp and very little circumstance. I had a great party at home with the people who have taught me so much over the past years. But a few days afterwards, I was feeling so depressed. I don't know exactly why. I missed Gordon, so much, especially now that it is nearly summer, and I was unsure about the future, feeling lonely as I begin to say good bye to my friends here in Homer, while not knowing what next fall will bring. "Why don't you blog?" my dad said, last night. I groaned. "No one reads it anyway!" I complained.

I guess I was wrong.

Some months ago, I was accepted to the University of Madison-Wisconsin, and their School of Music, but I simply didn't have enough money to be able to attend. I was mentally prepared for Fairbanks, ready for what the future will hold, ready to do my best with the resources I have. Then, suddenly, unexpectedly, my life changed. I received an email late last night from my part-time neighbors Brad Feld and his wife Amy Batchelor, offering me a very large scholarship that will make it possible for me to attend UW-Madison after all. They had been reading my blog, and remembered my post about not being able to go to UW. Now, because of them, it is possible. I am still in a state of shock.

It is really incredible how fast things change, for worse, and sometimes, for better, much better. Suddenly, doors are flung open, new paths open up, and I am lifted from my doldrums with something more incredible than I could ever imagine. Thank you, Brad and Amy, thank you so much. This will change my life, and I am so excited.

I guess I'll keep blogging after all.

Being Home, Thoughts About Creativity, and Ear Training

2007-05-07T23:55:00.000-05:00

It always seems to take a day or two to "get back into the swing of things" after an Anchorage Symphony weekend. I'm finally "back", but I wish the symphony season wasn't over. Ah well, next fall will hold many new adventures, and I plan to sneak back to Anchorage now and then for a few rehearsals and a concert or two.

...

One of the best things about my education so far is that I have the ability to express myself creatively through many different "outlets". I get inspired by something--a person, a concert, an idea--and I can express it through playing the piano, or writing a fiddle tune, or drawing or painting, or writing a poem or an essay. I can never tell how a certain idea is going to take shape, whether it will be sound or picture or words. People that inspire me generally become portraits, though I have written music about people too, and written word "portraits" like "How Long is a Zillasecond?". It's always fun to wait and see, letting the ideas take shape in whatever medium they demand.

...

I've been spending about an hour a day doing ear training. I have several exercises I do; interval recognition via www.musictheory.net or melodic and harmonic dictation, using a workbook and a set of CDs. I listen to a short melody, aiming for three times or fewer, and then write it down on blank staff paper. The workbook supplies the key and time signature for each melody, but other than that, I have to transcribe entirely by ear. I have a pretty good ear, but it is relatively untrained, undeveloped. I've spent a lot of time harmonizing melodies by ear--a necessity in Celtic and Cape Breton music. But I have a lot of work to do before I will be able to transcribe very complex melodies or harmonies, especially venturing into the realm of the atonal. "If a cat walks across the keyboard, you have to be able to write it down," Randy Fleischer told me, pantomiming scribbling on a piece of paper. Like so many things, it is a skill than is acquired with practice, and I can at least get a head start before my ear training classes at UAF next fall.

And thank you to every musician in the orchestra

2007-04-29T14:26:00.000-05:00

A few minutes before the Friday dress rehearsal was scheduled to begin, my dad and I walked backstage. I looked out at the empty hall, and then over at the almost 300 chairs onstage. Papa turned to me, "Hey, I thought that looked familiar!" He pointed to the music stands, on each of which sat a thank you card.

I made two cards a few days ago, one for Randy and one for the Anchorage Symphony, with a couple of my own ink drawings, and a brief note thanking everyone for their music and their part in inspiring me to study conducting and pursue a career in music. I gave one card to Randy, and one to Sherri Reddick, the symphony's executive director. Before the dress rehearsal, Sherri had photocopied the card I gave to her and set one out for every single musician in the orchestra! I was so surprised and absolutely delighted! Thank you, Sherri; that was so sweet of you!

I had a very nice lunch with Randy on Friday--he answered all of my questions, shared his own experiences and gave me much practical and appreciated advice. I am now much more comfortable pursuing a piano performance major, and I have a good idea of what to prepare for and what to strive for as a conducting student. He also offered to give me one or two lessons next fall. He told me that there are many misconceptions about launching a musical career, like having to be "discovered". You have to work hard and be persistant, he said. "I can do that," I said. "Of course you can!" he replied.

Then Randy smiled and said, "I feel I would be remiss if I didn't tell you something that an acting teacher once told my wife. Actually, I'd better write this down for you." I slid a piece of paper and a pen over to him (I'd been making notes of names and textbooks). He wrote a single sentence, handed the paper back to me, and said, "And I quote 'It might as well be your ass up there on that stage.' " I laughed. I'm going to keep that slip of paper forever.

Speechless

2007-04-29T10:47:00.000-05:00

I just sat there, unable to speak, unable to find words to describe what I was feeling. My hands stung from applauding, and there were people all around me, standing up, donning their coats and handbags and pushing past me as the lights in the hall came on. Finally I rose to my feet, and my mother and I made our way through the current of people out the door. I said nothing for some time, finally coming back to the world around me when we sat down in the restaurant for dinner. That music, terrifying, mournful, haunting, still rings in my ears. I'm going back to hear it again this afternoon.

They dedicated the concert to Marilyn Yonley, a violinist in the symphony who passed away last month. Randy dedicated personally his performance to Rostropovich, Randy's mentor and friend, and with whom he worked as the assistant conductor of the National Symphony Orchestra. I kept thinking about my mentor and friend, Gordon. I know how it hurts to lose a mentor, how painful it is when a dear friend dies.

Verdi Requiem: first rehearsal

2007-04-27T15:06:00.000-05:00

Writing this in our hotel room in downtown Anchorage.

First of all, we heard this morning that Mistislav Rostropovich, the great Russian cellist and conductor, died yesterday in Moscow. He was 80 years old and had been suffering from intestinal cancer.

...

The rehearsal yesterday of the Anchorage Symphony, the Anchorage Chamber Singers, and the Anchorage Concert Chorus, was as exciting as I knew it would be. I brought along a study score of the Requiem and was very proud of myself for not losing my place in in the seven movement, 1 hr 20 minutes long piece. I could not believe how many people were crammed onto the stage in the Atwood Hall! The security guard at the front door estimated there were 300 people onstage.

Kristin, the marketing and public relations director, said to me with a smile, "Thank you for being our friend on myspace!" Yes, the ASO does have a myspace page. Kristin also told me that she has been enjoying reading this blog, so I'd better be careful about what I write!

After Gordon Wright died in February, I have been without a mentor or an advisor in my conducting studies. I'm still a little uncertain about the proper focus for my undergrad music studies--I think piano performance is a perfectly appropriate major, but I so wish I could talk to Gordon, to ask him what he would do. I am incredibly fortunate, however, to be able to bombard Randall Craig Fleischer with questions; in an email a few weeks ago, I asked if I could talk to him for a few minutes sometime--he immediately offered to meet with me, and my dad and I are going to have lunch with him in an hour.

My dad is sitting next to me, saying, "Are you writing about me and the bass drum?" So, my dad sits towards the back of the first violin section, right in front of the bass drum. If any of you are familiar with Verdi's Requiem Mass, you will know that in the second movement, the "Dies Irae", there are four huge, earsplitting chords that alternate between the orchestra and a single bass drum. The bass drummer asked my dad, "Sorry; Randy said he wants it as loud as possible! Do you want an earplug or something?" My dad laughed. "No!" he said, "I love it! There are people who would kill for this seat!" The bass drummer, having expected a complaint, grinned, "Yeah! You're right!" "There's no one saying, 'Turn the music down! It's too loud!" Even I, sitting in the middle of the hall, could feel the rumbling vibrations and the sudden smack! of the drum.

Reserving Judgments

2007-04-25T16:03:00.000-05:00

The latest Tribune column was published today, available online here: http://www.homertribune.com/article.php?aid=1556

Performance with a capital "P"

2007-04-23T11:42:00.000-05:00

My parents are out fishing today, my brother is alseep in bed, and I'm halfway through lesson 110 of 117 in my calculus book. I ought to be reading about the graphs of r=2cos 3 (theta) but am taking a few minutes to write a blog post instead.

Sometimes you see yourself heading in a certain direction, doing a certain thing, acting a certain way. You have it all planned out, you think you know exactly how you are going to accomplish what you set out to do, and then you end up heading in the same direction but in an entirely new way than you envisioned for yourself. I was mentally prepared for attending college next fall as a BA in Music, or maybe a theory major. At some point I had "decided" that I would not be a performance major, that it wasn't who I was, that I couldn't do it. Well, it looks like I'm going to be a Performance major with a capital "P" after all... If I was going to the University of Wisconsin, I would probably be majoring in theory, but this option is unfortunately not available in Fairbanks. My only choice for a "serious" music degree is Performance, whether or not that was the route I originally had planned. I see the wisdom of Eduard Zilberkant's advice: you must be able to play if you are going to conduct. You must be able to make music yourself if you are going to help others to do this. Of course, I understand. The only thing in my way is a mental barrier. I have done what I considered impossible before. I can do it again.

...

The next Anchorage Symphony concert, the last of the season, is next weekend! I can't wait to see and hear the 180+ people onstage, singing and playing that glorious music. We will be driving up to Anchorage on Thursday, rehearsals Thursday and Friday, and I'm going to both the Saturday and Sunday concerts. I always seem to blog a lot when I'm in Anchorage for a concert, so hopefully there will be interesting narratives here over the next week.

Verdi's Requiem PSA

2007-04-22T20:05:00.001-05:00

The last Anchorage Symphony concert of the season is next weekend, one of the greatest choral works ever written!